Must Read: Awkward Ways I Met Girls

7 years ago

Must Read: Awkward Ways I Met Girls

“What is it” Tega asked a little surprised
“You’d find out soon enough” I said
We went into our rooms. Soon as I entered, switched on the TV and sat by the edge of my bed, the intercom rang
“Hello?”
“What’s the gift you have for me” Tega asked calmly
“Tell me right now, I don’t like surprises. You shouldn’t have told me. You should have just given me whenever u want to give” she said angrily
“Okay, its a box of chocolates” I joked
Mtscheeeeeew! A looong hiss resounded in my ears
“Don’t leave me in suspense again, I don’t like it” with that she said goodnight and dropped.

Woow! I don cross my line this night.

Like a zombie, without thinking nor waiting I picked up the bottle of Baileys I had bought in the afternoon, opened my door and down the corridor I went straight to the door adjacent mine. I knocked.
“Who is it” I heard Tega ask
“Open up” I said hoping she’d catch on to the voice.

The next moment, the door flung wide open and in the doorway appeared a charm! Pure charm!
In a blue vest that hugged her at the breasts she stood looking at me. I couldn’t help my eyes slowly moving from her face, down her neck to her breasts. I looked no further. And slowly I retraced the flow of the look back to her face directly into her eyes. She didn’t take her eyes off me nor did she say a word all the while.

Then she crossed her arms on her chest like to say
‘Yes? What do you want?’
I just stretched forward my hand with the bottle of Baileys.
Her face lit up like a child handed a box of chocolates!
“Woow!”.

She covered her mouth with one hand and put the palm of the other hand on her breasts cleavage. She was acting like Baileys was an out of this world thing. I think not. I figured she actually likes surprises, the opposite of what she had earlier said.

From her reaction, she must definitely love Baileys the extra mile. I did a good job of listening for details when conversing with a lady…for out of the heart a mouth speaketh. But I think the excitement is that it must have come at a right time too.

Without a word I turned back and walked back to my room, only to find out I didn’t even close my room door. I entered and closed it behind. I went and took a shower and dialed kitchen that they bring up food with water to my room. They said they’d be up in 30minutes. Exactly 25 minutes later, Funke came up with what I requested.

I thanked her. As she was going out I called her back. Picked up my wallet on the table and pulled out two crisp 1000 naira note and handed it to her. She asked what it was for that our food had been paid for. I said it was for her to keep. To my amazement, she calmly smiled and said “Oh, thank you sir. but I can’t receive tips”
Before I could say anything else, she gently placed it on the side stool, walked to the door and said
“Goodnight Sir. And please dont be offended”
With that, she left. I think I had a protective likeness for this cute girl which such dazzling hips. No, not to yansh. Just the natural likeness.

“Wait a minute” I hurriedly said “Have u seen that my friend, is she downstairs?”
“She only came to ask for ice blocks, she may be in her room now.”

I realized I had used the wrong word to ask.

My friend or my colleague?

I ate, dialed kitchen again to clear the table. It was Funke again.
“Are u people specifically assigned to each guest?”
“No, we are assigned to rooms”
Hmmm…

The relationship between me and Funke was somewhat of respect. Or again, she might just be a very likeable person naturally.. I sensed she may like me. That look in her dreamy eyes and the way she talked to me? But again, a guy shouldn’t always get corky when a girl likes him because it might just be for the wrong reasons and kill her vibes.

I treat people who attend to me right. Regardless who or where. You render me a service that I actually paid for, I’d still say “Thank you”.

You know, just courtesy. And still give tips freely when I can.

When I call on the intercom, I make any request with “Please…” I say thank you when they attend to me
When they greet me, I don’t start with “how are you?” I go with “hello” or I say “Good morning” right back. Just avoid being obnoxious when you are loaded with cash. One evening I gave away a pack of fumman juice. I had requested one not chilled, they brought a chilled one. Instead of getting angry and being rude to any of them, I looked the other way. The next person that came up was Joe the cleaner.

After cleaning I asked him to sit. He removed his cap and cleaned his hands on his shirt before sitting. I gave him to juice to drink. He was shocked. Those little things that matter. Little did I know that Joe had gone to spread word about me being nice to him. This, I suspected endeared many of them to me. Funke inclusive.

So, I could easily ask a favour of any of them and they will oblige me.

But while i was Mr Nice Guy, I would later learn when we got back to lagos that KC had b@nged one of the hotel attendants. Idowu told me.

KC had given her the girl some money that night and got la!d.

Idowu had wanted to F**K Funke, but since she wouldn’t bulge he lost out.
Knock knock on my door brought me back from my thoughts. I checked the time,
Who could it be?
“who?” I asked in a low tone.
“Open” I recognized the voice.
My door opened and Tega entered with the bottle of Baileys, chilled.
“Don’t you ever lock your door?”
“I’m not expecting a thief” I said. She laughed.
“I thought you’d have finished the whole bottle”
“Did you think I was going to drink it all alone?”
I laughed.
“Sorry if the suspense was unnecessary” I said in a casual attempt to apologize
“A pleasant gift. The whole week had been rather dull, just routines. From the hotel to the branches and back and same thing the next day” she retorted.
With a sigh, she sank on the bed.

I got up and dialed kitchen for two cups. It was Funke who came up with them. She entered, didn’t look at anybody’s face, dropped the cups and left.
“Why do u make the girl nervous” I asked
“Who? Me? Maybe she thinks I’m ur girlfriend, or wife” she said after a brief hesistation.

“And u’d be staying in a different room? so you really think if you were my girlfriend, i’d let you stay in a different room?” I flirted sensing the mood.

Tega laughed in a ‘girlie’ manner but did not say anything
“That one can never happen o” I said…

On and on we chatted. She poured us the drink, handed a cup to me and went straight to my laptop. Next song I heard playing was Brian Adams singing ‘Heaven’. a cool song, I tell you!
She was lying on the bed. I sat on the chair and we were talking nothing significant.

The content of her cup drained and she stretched out the cup. I refilled it.

That sweetness of the cream! Easily to sip. Slowly we got tipsy, then we got high.

“Do you have any song by Anita Baker” she asked.

But why couldn’t she just check list of artists in my windows media player or song in the iTunes.

“Yeah, many” I went over to where she la!d.

I sat by the edge of the bed, slightly turned the laptop to search for the song. At the angle I turned it, she adjusted to see what I was doing.

The side of her face was touching my upper arm.

I had a vest on.

Her face touching my arm sent tingles through my body. I sipped at my drink, camly. But like a lion whose hunting instinct had been ignited had sensed and marked his meal. I found and played soul music from Baker. Seemingly oblivious of her face touching my arm and sending some warmth.

I had not the slightest idea of what Anita Baker does to her. Nor of the extent Baileys had done.