Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 148
Two Male officers and a Female officer.
“Where were you all on the night of Chief
Ogbonna’s murder?” A male Officer asked us.
I saw from his name tag that his name was
“we were at home, all of us” I replied.
“so since u were all at home, what happened
between 2300hours and 1am” Another Officer
asked. From his name tag, i saw that his
name was a tongue twister. His name had
more consonants than vowels. According to
what i saw, his name was Ejunykpokpo,
sounded like “Enjoying kponkpon”. Because
the name sounded funny, i smiled.
“why are u smiling, do u think we are here for
joke?” the Female officer yelled at me.
“no Aunty Officer, naso my face dey. If i no
dey smile, e go be like say i dey smile” I
Her name wasn’t Aunty Officer, but Aunty
Officer Bimpe, sorry, Officer Bimpe(miss)
according to her name tag. That meant she
wasn’t married. “who go marry you sef, u
think say any Ibo boy go marry O”femmanu
girl like you?” I mistakenly said with a low
voice, like i whispered it loud enough for my
friends seating close to me to hear and not
loud enough for the Officers to hear. It was a
slip of tongue. So my friends laughed.
“what did u say?” Officer Bimpe yelled at me
and stood up. She even brought out koboko.
Koboko a.k.a horse whip a.k.a chop and clean
“so na me u wan flog koboko, dem no born
you well make you flog me” I couldn’t say
“i say what did u say” she yelled raising her
hand as if she wanted to flog me.
Though she had not flogged me yet, but in the
spiritual realm she had already flogged me
and i could feel the “tingling senstation” of
the pain in my back.
So in other for the spiritual not to turn
physical, i instantly switch on my “lie clock” to
figure out the best lie to say. TIC………..TOCK,
TIC……….TOCK, went my lie clock. Finally the
clock stopped at about 1759hours.
“i said you are a very beautiful woman and
you will make a good wife” I answered.
“i tot u said something else” Officer Bimbe
said and sat down. “that is what he said” my
guys defended me.
“so naso woman for flog me koboko, God
forbid!” i tot.
“now what happened between 2300hours and
1am” Officer Enjoying Kpokpon or rather
Tega started explaining with a mind blowing
With words that could run one’s stomach.
Mehn! Tega could speak. A grammarian
indeed if i must say. That kin Yanky English.