Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 97
As Old Solja alighted from Madam Ifeoma’s car, i
noticed he was looking younger and kept unlike
the last time i saw him about a month ago.
“Old Solja!! Old Solja!!” we cheered. “my boys! How
unu dey” He smiled revealing his rotten teeth.
The kind of teeth no toothpaste in the whole wide
world could clean. The only remedy to bring the
sparkling back to his teeth was if he tried
brushing with a mixture of Ogogoro, Brukutu,
Omo, Jik, and Kerosene. And an Iron sponge would
do the “dirty job” of scrubbing.
Ogogoro is spirit, alcoholic spirit, while Brukutu is
a native alcoholic drink that is sometimes reddish.
Why i prefered Ogogoro to Brukutu is because, the
first day i drank Ogogoro to stupor, i saw the Sun
and the Moon dancing round my head.
Before i throw more light on Brukutu, be warned,
never you drink Brukutu alone, never!! It is best
enjoyed with friends.
As for Brukutu, since i was born, the one and only
day i ate my poo was the day i drank Brukutu to
stupor at Mammy market in the Barracks. That
day, i saw the heap of my poo as a heap of Moi Moi,
so i took just a chunk, and then one for the road
(those of una wey dey vex say i dey talk about
s’hit, make una no vex i dey talk am as e happen).
I was just Twelve then, and it was a juvenile
adventure i embarked on. After taking about
three cups of “BK” as it is popularly known, i went
to a nearby bush, pood and ate half of it. I smelt
of poo as i walked home that night.
I know you would be asking why i ate poo when i
The answer to that is simple; that was the first
day i tasted anything alcohol, so i had planned
taking it alone. Brukutu commisioned my drinking
career. What happened when i got home that day
is a story for another day.
“Old Solja wetin you dey chop na?” I asked Old
Solja who walked towards where we sat resting.
“na Kola” Old Solja replied.
Kola is a short form for Kolanut, and Kolawole.
Legend has it that Kolanut is an express way to
having rotten teeth. And also, the moment you
eat Kolanut, you have murdered sleep, sleep will
be so far from you.
“unu want Kola?” Old Solja offered. “i no want” I
and Brainbox said at the same time. But Man
accepted it. Why?
Because he was a Mallam. And Kolanut was like
Candy to a typical Mallam.
An hour later and we were through digging the
“bottomless” pit, that was 30minutes after
Igbakwambo and Ochabuorie finished digging
Madam Ifeoma ordered us to perfect the work by
showing us some places we had to dig, which we
did, albeit reluctantly. She was just searching for