Men Dey Reason - S01 E89

Story 2 years ago

Men Dey Reason - S01 E89

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 89

That was cheating. As if it was possible for two

persons to share a phone.

But i complained not, neither did Man, afterall our

hands weren’t the hands that stole it.

All the phones were expensive, that i wondered

how those motor park touts operated such

expensive phones. Well, they weren’t the real

owners, neither were we. The real owners

weren’t those that bought the phones at first,

the real owners were to come. Infact the real

ownership is unending. Until it gets to the “final

looter”.

Untill then, the owners of the Nokia camera phone

were Man and Flow.

“una wicked oh, see as una take better phone com

give me and Man this r’ubbish camera phone, e no

good oh” I complained. What i never knew was

that that phone would be the Goose that would lay

us a Golden egg in the nearest future.

“Tupac take this 5k, minus am for the money wey i

dey owe your” Man offered Tupac.

“make we gamble na” Brainbox suggested and they

started gambling.

I knew somebody’s share of the loot would soon go

down the drain. My prayer was that it shouldn’t

be my crony Brainbox. On a second thought, it

would be better for him to lose it, afterall he had

paid his 33k.

Knowing that gambling was tempting, i hurriedly

left the room to avoid Super story. Man joined

me.

“guy the phone get bluetooth oh” Man noticed as

he accessed the phone.

I cared not whether the phone had greentooth or

yellowtooth, or even if it was toothless, all i cared

about at that moment was that i needed some

weed.

“make we go Paapa place na” I suggested.

“guy no worry, i carry weed for my pocket, make

we go backyard go smoke am” Man said.

We got to the dirty backyard, sat down and

started wrapping our weed.

Suddenly i heard, “sutu uwe gi”, it was a female

voice. A familiar one at that.

“sutu uwe gi” i could now figure that it was Kate’s

voice.

My brain was sharp enough to know that “Sutu

uwe gi” literally means “remove your clothes”.

That meant a man was about to remove his

clothes, or so i tot.

I was anxious to know who the man was, and how

the f”ucking would look like, so i tiptoed towards

Kate’s window, Man followed behind.

To our greatest surprise, we saw no man but two

women.

Mama Ejima and Kate.

Mama Ejima was kneeling down. Maybe she was

pleading for something as i could see she wore a

“pity” face. Or maybe not.

“anunam nunu, sutu uwe gi” Kate said. That was

when it dawned on me that Mama Ejima was

actually pleading.

“anunam nunu” means “i have heard you”. Kate

was an indigene of Owerri North local

government, so was Mama Ejima, that was why

they both loved conversing with Owerri dialet. A

dialet that sounded like Efik.

As Mama Ejima started u’ndressing, i was

wondering what her offence was that would

warant her to u’ndress before she would be

pardoned.

The drama started.