Food Is Ready - S01 E01

Story 2 years ago

Food Is Ready - S01 E01

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 1

(Light dims, curtain opens)

It all starts with one of ma friends

He had spent almost two semesters,

Chasing and hunting down dis particular girl,

But no service mein!!!!

She just felt my friend was not good enough for her or maybe something else, because any move he was making was yielding no results….

He took it from all d modern known means,

Down to ancient methods.

writing perfumed letters, folded in a heart shape….

Sending flowers with notes,

Bribing her friends to keep chocolates and various other goodies under her pillow…

w€tin remain sef

Na to stand for her room window for night,

Throw stone…den when she come outside

He begins singing with a romantic band he must have put together

Which of course will be comprised of me and some other junkies….

But as e be say

We no sabi sing and all,

We made sure he stuck to all he had been doing… abeg!! We no want wahala…

Beht Girls eh!!!!

Kai!!!

Dat my guy suffer ahn!! Ahn!!.

Phone calls….

Text messages

Recharge cards…which d gal neva accepted instead sef on one ocassion she send am back plus extra ontop…. check out na…

Even me sef follow dey compose poems give am.

Inshort let’s just say that it was a collective effort by all of us…

To make sure say….

she dey mad?…she must gree joor!!!!

But I must say….

D girl fine sha…

If you see shape eh….choi!!!

She set pass mathset…..

Her English na die….

Few people live after hearing it

Walking step na mental….

Fit put u for yaba Left….

Smile na heiiiiiiiiiiii smh

Eyes na hypertension

staring @ it na @ owners risk…

And she come know say she fine…

So d shakara na highest…

Beht eh After months of toasting

Incessant fasting…(cos d idiot don spend most of him money finish…and our money too…)

And Countless praying….

The Lord answered his/our prayer….

Igbo woman’s voice:Umu chineke eiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

The Lorttt is gooooooodtttt…….

I say the Lordtttt isi gooooodttt ooooo….

Hmmmmmmm

She agreed….