The Heartbroken - S01 E51

Story 2 years ago

The Heartbroken - S01 E51

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 51

“I’ve told you before—I

don’t want to want him

back,” I said. “It’s just

—I can’t completely cut

him off.”

“Just fall in love.”

My eyes widened,

completely taken by

surprise; not with the

sentence itself, but

with the way he said it.

His electric blue eyes

were staring deeply into

mine, his voice somber.

The expression on his

face was completely

serious.

“Look for somebody

else you can fall in love

with. You don’t have to

forget Cedric. Forcing

yourself to forget

somebody is a sign that

you’re not moving on.

Moving on is not

forgetting—moving on

is being able to

remember without

feeling awful about it.”

I looked at him.

“As much as you might

want to, you will never

erase Cedric from your

memories. He won’t

just magically disappear

from your life. You have

to deal with the pain of

knowing him and be

able to live with it. Let

someone else in.”

Another question had

crawled its way into my

mind. There was

something about the

way he talked, the way

he looked at me as he

told me these things,

the way he hung his

head as if he was

letting everything else

take its own course and

the way his eyes held

mine, like offering

himself in his most

vulnerable state.

“Seth?”

“Yeah?”

“Have you ever fallen in

love?”

“Oh.”

“What ‘oh’?” I

prompted, eager to

hear his answer, for

some reason I couldn’t

quite explain. I guess it

was just that Seth was

a player, someone who

never took girls

seriously. The idea of

him being in love, really

in love, was so

unfamiliar that I even

refused to acknowledge

it.

A look crossed his face

—one that was

bordering on hesitant—

and it was all it took for

me to know the

answer. That simple

pause, that little

moment when he

blinked thrice without

saying anything, the

way he looked away

from my gaze.

“Oh my god,” I said.

“What happened? Who

was she?”

“I…” He trailed off. “I

won’t answer any

questions about this

particular topic.”

I blinked. “What? That’s

—that’s against the

rules.”

“No. I’m using my pass

—on everything related

to this topic,” he said,

squirming a little on his

seat.

“Seth freaking Everett

had fallen in love

before,” I couldn’t help

muttering out loud,

shaking my head

slightly. “Who would

have thought?”

“Yeah, well…” He

scratched the back of

his head, his eyes

looking straight ahead.

“I’m just human, after

all.”

For some unexplainable

reason, we decided to

stop the game. We still

kept count with the

questions (I still have

six and he still has

seven) but we were

suddenly both too tired

to continue.

There was something

exhausting about baring

yourself that way—

showing someone your

secrets; being “human,”

like Seth had said.

Being human was

exhausting. All the shit

about living and falling in

love and getting hurt,

being stupid, making

choices, feeling happy

—“being human” is all

about these things. No

one could ever argue

that this wasn’t tiring.

Sometimes, you just

want to crawl in bed

and sleep and let go of

all these things, forget

about life and every

little thing that comes

with it.

Apparently, Seth had

the same idea.

Just as I was tucking

myself into bed (in the

guest room), the door

creaked open in that

scary way only horror

movies ever do,

revealing Seth Everett

holding a pillow. “I”—he

raised his hand, index

finger pointing at

himself—“am sleeping

here.”