Oh Brother - S01 E32

3 years ago

Oh Brother - S01 E32

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 32

Without a word, he then put his hand into the bag. My heart froze for a second as he pulled out a black leather jacket. He smiled at that and put it on his lap.

“Thanks-”

“There’s more,” I cut in. “In the jacket.”

He opened up the jacket quickly and a black chain fell out along with a book. Smiling once again, he picked up the book and stared at it. Fascination was evident in his eyes.

“The Outsiders.” He brought his eyes to mine. “Since when did you know I read?”

“I didn’t.” I grinned. “I just thought you should meet your people, the greasers. They’re like bad boys who dress the way you do.”

He laughed. “Ah, and you’re encouraging me to join them with all these black pieces of clothing.”

My grin grew. “Well, you already got the awesome fighting skills down.”

At that, Christian suddenly grew serious. He frowned and looked away from me, making me regret saying that. But before I could say anything, he shifted closer to me. Now our legs and shoulders were touching, and my heart froze. I wasn’t ready for this.

“Autumn,” he said, still serious. “I don’t think I ever thanked you.”

“For what?” I asked, trying to forget about how near we were.

“For changing me.” He finally looked at me, his blue eyes sincere. “You made me a better person.”

Even though I had heard this from Stephen before, I asked, “How?”

I wanted to know his feelings. What he thought. And honestly, what he genuinely felt for me. Even if we couldn’t be what I wanted, I wanted to mean something to him.

“I don’t know.” He suddenly smiled. “I just look at you and want to be a good guy. I want you to think good of me and I never want to disappoint you.”

It was probably because of how near we were, but I suddenly felt like an open book as my heart melted. Words I would usually never say were on the tip of my tongue, and I didn’t care if they were too mushy for my liking. As for now, I wanted to let us mean something to each other.

“You are a good guy,” I said. “And you never disappoint me.”

His smile grew. “You make me happy, you know. Really happy and sometimes it’s scary.”

I couldn’t help but look away from him at those words, knowing I couldn’t let him see how much they meant to me. “Me too.”

I felt my ears heat up as I wondered what had gotten into me. This wasn’t the person I was; I hated talking about feelings. I hated admitting how much someone truly meant to me. It had always made me feel vulnerable, but here I was doing it.

As I continued to look away wondering, I suddenly felt a finger on my chin. Before I knew it, the finger was pushing my face so that I was looking at Christian again. He was already looking at me with eyes filled with affection and to my surprise, lust.

“You have no idea how much what you just said means to me,” he said quietly, as if it was supposed to be a secret between the two of us. “You have no idea how much you mean to me.”

This time, I couldn’t look away as my heart skipped a beat. We were so close to each other, so intimate with just our eyes. Even though this was a moment I had wanted between us, a moment I even cherished now, my mind started screaming incest.

But before I could move away from him. Before I could even tell him that I had to leave, knowing I couldn’t take being so close to him, he moved forward and planted his lips on mine. It happened so fast that I froze, completely thrown off guard.

My eyes widened as he kissed me gently. With his lips just as soft as I assumed, he kissed me. My heart was pounding hard and my body felt limp from the touch, but my mind was screaming. Screaming that I needed to get away from him. That this was wrong. That this was incest. So no matter how badly I wanted to kiss him back. No matter how much my body screamed for me to just hold him against me and kiss his lovely lips, I didn’t. I just stayed where I was frozen.

After a few seconds, he pulled away from me and frowned. I looked away as I spotted the hurt in his eyes, knowing that we were in a horribly awkward situation. We shouldn’t be, but we were cursed to be step-siblings. I felt anger at the thought, knowing I just ruined something I really wanted because of such a simple name.

“You didn’t kiss me back,” Christian commented. “You… Don’t want to?”

I couldn’t look at him. I couldn’t bare to because what I would say next was something that would probably hurt me more than him.

“Obviously.” I smiled sadly to myself. “We’re step-siblings… Incest. That’s disgusting.”

We were still sitting right next to each other, so I noticed him wince. My own heart dropped painfully as I told him the truth I wanted to deny. I told him something that would make him reconsider ever putting a move on me. Suddenly, I wanted to cry.

“Do you really think… It’s disgusting?” Christian asked, sounding flat.

I looked at him to see if he was angry, but he was expressionless. He was staring blankly at me, looking slightly confused. My heart stung and my brain hurt, even though it had been the one screaming incest a moment ago.

“Yeah,” I said quietly. “Don’t you?”

He shrugged and suddenly laid down on my bed. I frowned as I watched him close his eyes. Right now I wanted to cry, but he looked so relaxed. It hurt more to see him like this, but I considered the fact that he was drunk. This whole event happened because he was drunk, I realized miserably.

After a couple of minutes, I decided to tell him that we should just erase this from our memories, just like every other moment we had together. But as I looked at him again, I saw that his chest was rising up and down in a peaceful rhythm. I frowned as I realized he was asleep, and I suddenly slid to the ground.

With him asleep, I allowed myself to cry quietly. Even if Christian was drunk, I wondered if he wanted more too. If he craved our touched, our affection, just like me. If so, my heart would shatter. Knowing he wanted me back would break me since we could be more if it weren’t for that stupid word incest. I hated it and everything it represented. I hated what it was doing to me.