Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

Episode 6 years ago

Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

“police is your friend” “bail is free” “obey law and order”, all these was what i saw written on the wall as we entered the station.

They took Ojiga somewhere i couldn’t tell. “this ones na thief dem be abi?” a police man at the counter asked, “na ur papa be thief, see ur big head” i cursed within me. “no them no be thief, na their friend be thief, just take their statement” one of the Police men that brought us instructed. I took a sigh of relief bcos we would not be locked up, just that there needed our statements. “to write statement una go pay 1000naira oh, 500naira for one person” the police man said, “500 wetin?” i almost asked.

“Ilorin, u carry money come? I asked, “e be like say i carry but na only 500naira oh” Ilorin said. At that moment i felt like crying, “y my own be like dis na, wetin i go do now?” i tot. “ehn Ilorin we go beg am say na only 500naira we get” i said. “na u go beg am oh” Ilorin responded as i saw great fear in his eyes. “ehnn Oga Officer, na only 500naira we get here, abeg sir collect am like that sir” i stammered. “una dey mad ni? Bad boys like una, una get money una hide am com dey give me 500 abi” he said “officer we no get, if to say we get we for give u sir” Ilorin said. “ok i go search una, and if i c money ehn una don die be that” the police man shouted. “yes sir, search us, we no get money, abi Flow?” Ilorin asked turning to face me, “ye ye ye yes sir” i stammered. At that moment, i felt like runing out of the station. “if i run, them fit suspect me come shot me, and if i comot dis weed for my pocket com put am for ground peaople go notice, abi make i lie say i wan go piss com go flush am for toilet?” i tot.

“officer, i wan go piss” i said, “u no dey go anywhere until i search una finish” the policeman said as he started to search Ilorin. Now urine goshed out of my p’enis wetting my trousers. I hurriedly touched my pocket wishing the nylon wrap of weed could disapear, but it didn’t. “u don free, now na ur turn” the policeman said as he left Ilorin and approached me.

My legs were vibrating as if i was in the process of electrocution. “so u haven’t taken their statements? Common! take their statements now” the policeman that brought us commanded, “yes sir!!!” the one searching said and immediately left us to go get paper. “God i thank u oh” i tot. I was saved by the bell.