Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

7 years ago

Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

]I got to hall F, i didn’t say a word as i immediately hit the bed. As i was aslept i tot i heard Lampard climbing his bunk, which was above mine. The next morning i ate double ration of the Egusi soup and Eba they prepared in the dinning bcos i collected the meal card of Ayo from him.

Day 10, “dem don dey give alawi oh” an inmate said. “Ayo make we go collect our own before people go plenty oh” i told Ayo.

As we were on our way i saw what made my jaw droped. Ezenna and Obinna where flogged with “koboko” by two soldiers close to the bush path. Me and Ayo drew closer as we overheard people saying Ezenna and Obinna has been caught with weed.

We drew even closer as i noticed dat i knew one of d soldiers. “Gbengus how far?” i said as i notice it was coporal Gbenga that i smoked weed with in the barracks. “who be u?” he asked. “na me na, Fanta” (i was known as “Fanta” in the barracks). “aah Fanta na u b dis, u don change oh, wetin u dey do here?” he asked a rather stupid question, “i be corper here na” i added. As i sharp barracks boy i just “cornered” Gbenga and gave him 3k for him to free my guys. He freed them saying, “dis barrack boy nahim save una today, una for leave this camp” and collected the weed from them. “Bad awoah, gbengus, e go go smoke the weed” i told Obinna as i immediately lied to him to give me 5k as that was the amout i gave the soldier to free them.

He gave the money instantly as i moved on. “So u b barrack boy?” Ayo asked “i b barrack boy na” “i be BAD BARRACK BOY (BBB)…….

]It was second round and for the Miss Nysc, contestants number 1,2,4,7 and 9 qualified, while contestants number 2,5,7,8 and 3 qualified for the Mr Macho. This time we are to dress on casuals/corperate wears. As Ayo gave me a whole bottle of Alomo to drink, i tot my heart was melting as the Alomo ran down my intestine. I was very[B] “high” and ready for any question to be asked. Contestant number 2 was first, he was dress on a yellow long sleeve shirt and a black trousers, he was asked to give five importance of Nysc to the nation, he answered it brillantly.

Next it was my turn. First question, “what is the meaning of RSM in the military” the anchor asked as i saw the camp RSM smiled. “na barrack boy una dey ask dis kin question?” i tot as i answered saying “Regimented Sergeant Major”. Second question, “what was your discipline in school?”, i answered saying industrial physics. Third questiön, “what is the importance of industrial physics to Nigerian economy?”. I couldn’t tell if i was the one answering the question or somebody called “Alomo” was whispering the answers to my ears.

It was time for the result to be called. We were earlier told dat the winner goes home with a laptop, while the first runner up goes home with a flat screen tv. The second runner up was to smile home with a standing fan. As we stood awaiting the result, someone was telling me “na u go win” and i was whispering “Amen, Amen, Amen” as i turned and saw nobody speaking, “or was it the spirit of “ ” talking” i asked myself. Suddenly i heard……… And the winner is contestant number TWO…………..two sounded like THREE to my ears……. Or was it the spirit of Alomo again that interpreted TWO as THREE to my brain