Must Read: An Incest Birthday (18+)

Episode 7 years ago

Must Read: An Incest Birthday (18+)

“Dana what the hell you didn’t hear the phone ringing next to you?” Rita asked.

Dana popped up from the little nap she was taking. “Sh*t! Don’t sneak up on people like that!”
Ashley and everybody else swam up to the side of the pool we were all standing at. “Hey, when did you all get here? I was gonna call you and tell you to come by with bathing suits.”
“Were just got here, your front door wasn’t locked. The house looked all deserted and Sh*t like somebody came in and kidnapped everybody,” I said.
“Awww were you worried? This is a good neighborhood, nobody steals or anything around here, practically everybody who lives around here leaves their door unlocked.”
“Yeah and somebody probably notices and you’re gonna come back and all your stuff will be on eBay getting sold by a crackhead for a hundred dollars,” Chris said.
“Always so freaking dramatic? Are you guys getting in the pool or what?” Carina asked.
“Well we never got the call to bring a bathing suit, soooooooo no,” Stephanie said.
“You don’t need a bathing suit, it’s just us here, just get in with your bra and p@anties, it’s practically the same thing, unless you’re not wearing any,” Becky giggled.
“Always a pervert. I have a bunch upstairs, you should know where they are,” Ashley said.
“That’s too much work. F**K it. bra and p@anties it is,” Stephanie said as she started undressing.
“F**K it, if you’re doing it, I’ll do it too. You getting in the water Dana?” Rita asked.
“Wasn’t planning on it, I’m doing fine just laying here and looking beautiful for everyone.”
“Hell no, if we’re getting in the water in our underwear, you’re definitely getting in,” Chris said.
“Don’t make me stuff my foot in your mouth again. I’ll get in when I’m good and ready.”
Chris got slightly embarrassed when she mentioned the dare he had to do, but it quickly turned sinister, like he instantly hatched a plot to get her in the water. “Randy, come with me.”
I followed him back into the house and watched as he rummaged around looking for something, then stopped when he picked up a big bucket. He filled it up with cold water and went to the freezer and dumped every ice cube he could get into the bucket.



“Now every time she brings that up, I’m gonna bring this up,” Chris said.
“Man if she catches you, she’s gonna beat your butt0ckz,” I laughed.
“She’s not, I’m jumping in the water, she’s not getting in until she feels like it remember?”
“If you dump a bucket of ice cold water on her I think she’s gonna feel like it!”
“Then I’ll just swim away from her, she won’t chase me the whole time I’m in there.”
“Alright man, it’s your funeral, not mine, she’s not gonna be chasing me.”
“Depends on how she looks at it, I need you to distract her while I sneak up behind her.”
“Uhh, pass. She could be one of those ‘hell hath no fury of a scorned woman’ girls. No dice.”
“Come on man, like you said she’ll be coming after me anyway, don’t be a scaredy butt0ckz. Just talk to her for a little bit then walk to the edge of the pool so I know she’s ready.”
I paused for a second. “You know what, fine. I’ll do it just to see what she does to your butt0ckz.”
He stirred the ice around in the bucket for a little longer and we went back outside, by now both Rita and Stephanie were in the pool with the other girls. I walked up to Dana who was on her phone laying out in the chair and set my phone on the table with the other ones and stripped down to my boxers.


“You sure you’re not getting in Dana? It’s pretty hot out here.”
“I wanna get hot, the water will feel that much better when I do get in.”



I walked towards the edge of the pool as Chris crept up behind her, completely oblivious to him behind her. He waited for her to put her phone down and lay back down, and then he struck.



“I NOMINATE DANA FOR THE ICE BUCKET CHALLENGE!”
He ran up and doused her in the cold water, making her draw up and shriek from the instant cold and making everybody else laugh. She was so cold her Tips went hard instantly.
“Haha! Now I have something on you whenever you bring up that foot thing!” Chris laughed.
Dana stood up and eyed him down. “You’re dead Chris, you hear me? You’re Bleeping dead!”
She chased Chris and he jumped into the pool, thinking he’d gotten away from her, but she followed right behind him. He started swimming to the other side of the pool, but I immediately knew he wasn’t gonna make it for two reasons, one, he jumped in like every other normal person, sloppy, and she did this perfect butt0ckz Olympic dive into the water, and two, he swam away freestyle, but she swam after him doing the butterfly. I could tell he knew he’d messed up when I saw his smile fade as he tried to get away, but it wasn’t happening. I followed around the side and watched as she closed the gap between them so fast I didn’t have time to be shocked. She swam faster than Aunt Lisa, who is the fastest swimmer in our family by far, and Dana looked like she could beat her easy. She caught Chris before he got to the halfway point in the pool and kept dunking him underwater, using her weight as leverage to push him under.
“Don’t think it’s so funny now huh? Didn’t think I could catch you?” Dana fumed.
“What the hell? What are you part fish? Who swims that fast?” Chris said in between dunks.
After a couple more dunks she let him go and he hung onto the wall to catch his breath. I jumped in beside him and laughed with everybody else as his plan backfired on him.
“Yeah you might not have noticed, but Dana’s pretty much a professional swimmer. She won the championship for the butterfly two years running,” Ashley laughed.
“That would’ve been nice to know before I jumped in the water!” Chris yelled. “How the F**K are you so fast with those big butt0ckz flotation devices sitting on your chest!”
“She could probably break the record easily if they weren’t slapping her in the face every time she came up for air,” Becky joked.



“Damn Chris, now she has two stories to use against you, nice try though,” Carina said.
“You just can’t catch a break,” Rita said. “Maybe you should mess with somebody else.”
“No. Small setback. All I gotta do is stay away from dares, and water,” Chris said.
“That’s only what you know about,” Dana said. “I have a lot more tricks up my sleeve buddy, and for the record, these tits are all real, no silicone flotation devices here.”
“This is crap man, I didn’t even get halfway across the pool!”
“Well you never were the fastest swimmer, Sh*t dad can beat you and he’s like a turtle in the water. On the bright side, you were winning BEFORE she jumped in
the water,” Stephanie said.
“I’m snitching. Randy helped me, he distracted you so I could sneak up behind you!”
“The hell man! Don’t take me down because Michael Phelps little sister caught you!”
“Nope, he gave me the green light, dunk him too!”
“I should, but you poured the cold butt0ckz water on me, so you’re the one who gets it, and don’t think I’m done either, I’m letting you catch your breath then you’re going right back under.”
“HA! That’s what you get, trying to take me down with you,” I said.
“Sh*t it was worth a try. If I’m going down might as well take somebody with me.”
“If you’re gonna die then that’s not a bad way to go, she was using her tits as weight on the top of your head to help push you underwater.”
“And you just happened to notice that?” Stephanie asked as she swam over to me.
“I may have, observed it happening, I can recall speculating it.”
“Well speculate this!”
I was suddenly pushed underwater by Rita who’d snuck up behind me while Stephanie was distracting me, basically the same thing we did to Dana, and like Dana, Rita also used her tits to help push me underwater. I came back up to see the other girls swimming towards Chris and I to make sure we didn’t get away. They all jumped on us, easily outnumbering and overpowering us as we could do nothing but go underwater whenever they pushed us under.




They weren’t cruel or anything with it, they didn’t hold us down there too long or keep doing it so fast that we couldn’t properly get air, they waited a few seconds in between and sent us right back to the bottom. I’m not gonna lie, in my haste to get free I was reaching for and grabbing whatever I could get ahold of, and nine times out of ten I was grabbing someone’s tit or butt0ckz, and it wasn’t always Rita’s or Stephanie’s, but noone ever complained, soooooo yeah. It took a good while, but we were finally able to turn the tables on them, kinda, by grabbing them and dunking them two at a time. Whenever one of the free ones came to help we’d splash them in the face and go back to dunking the others until we all tired ourselves out. I got out and grabbed my phone and snapped pictures of everybody messing around in the pool, I got some of everybody ganging up on Chris, just Rita and Stephanie, and some of all the girls. Everybody else got out and took their own pictures so I could get in on some too. By the time we were done everyone snapped at least ten with their phone and we had enough pictures to fill an entire book. We got back in and went back to dunking and slamming each other in the water over and over, Chris picked on Dana more than the others after the way she messed with him earlier, since she was stationary in the water she wasn’t as deadly, and he took full advantage. I straight up just took turns powerbombing and choke slamming and RKO’ing everybody in the water from off the side into the deep end, they even joined in and started slamming each other, so it turned into a big Wrestlemania type free for all for the next hour plus until everybody finally had enough of being tossed in the water like rag dolls.
“Ok, ok, let’s take a break, I’m tired now,” Rita said huffing for air.
“What’s the matter Dana? Can’t help since we’re not swimming?” Chris teased.
“Don’t get cocky, I can still take you one on one, or did you forget already?” Dana responded.
“I was caught off guard earlier, I didn’t know you could swim faster than everybody ever, but in one spot you can’t do nothing, I have way more strength than you.”




“If that’s what you wanna keep telling yourself go ahead, I’ll even play along with you.”
“Why don’t you two go bang underwater somewhere and get it over with,” Carina jumped in.
“Please, he wouldn’t know the first thing about satisfying a woman like me,” Dana said.
“That’s easy, do like every other man you’ve been with, be alive, and show up,” Becky laughed.
“We all can’t live by your way of finding a husband Becky,” Dana retaliated.
“I smell a catfight! I thought cats hated water though,” Stephanie said.
A funny thought popped in my head, but I chose to keep it to myself even though Rita and Ashley noticed me hold in a laugh. I let myself drift in the water and float past everybody as the water kept me cool but the sun baked my face. “OK, where we going from here? We can’t stay in the pool all day and I’m starting to get hungry.”
“Why can’t we stay here all day? I’m lazy today, Ashley has enough food in there to feed the whole neighborhood, and enough liquor to drink too,” Carina said.
“She has food, but whose gonna make it? I know I’m not,” Chris said as he looked around.
“That better not be a ‘women in the kitchen’ stare Chris,” Ashley said loudly.
“How is that… I looked at everybody, including Randy, last I checked he was a boy!”
“Well whatever we decide to do we need to hurry up, my hands are all pruny and I need to take a shower to wash off all this chlorine and change my clothes…” Becky started.
“Yeah yeah we get it Becky, so are we staying here or going somewhere?” Dana asked.
“We could go somewhere and eat, we’re all too lazy to make something and I kinda wanna go back to Café Stratos and get the parmesan again,” Rita said.




“Is that the little restaurant next to the Applebee’s uptown?” Ashley asked.
“Yeah you been there? Their chicken parmesan is the best thing out there.”
“I drive past it all the time but it always looked like one of those ‘hole in the wall’ type restaurants so I always kept going on went to the Applebee’s next to it.”
“We went the last two days, you gotta go in there, their food is way better than Applebee’s!”
“Well we know where we’re going now, so we need to get up and go before we all turn into some lazy fat asses and don’t wanna do anything,” Carina said.
“Well since we’re currently in our underwear we need to go home and shower first and get a change of clothes, we can just meet everybody up there,” I said.
“Sounds like a bet, as long as everybody doesn’t stay in the shower until all the hot water’s gone, I’m not gonna namedrop or anything but Randy and Rita,” Ashley laughed.
“I will not apologize for taking full advantage of showers, and I’m sure Rita won’t either.”
“Just try not to take up the rest of the day with it, we’ll all probably stay here and use my showers, it’s what, 3:45 now, we’ll meet there at 5:30, is that enough time?”
“Yeah it should be, we carpooled here so Stephanie and Chris will have to drop us back off at our house but yeah that should be long enough, we’ll just meet everybody there.”
“Ok well let’s go now, everybody talking about food made me hungry now,” Dana said.
“You’re always hungry, it’s just not always for food,” Becky laughed as she got out of the pool.
“You little Sl*t, bring your skinny butt0ckz back here!” Dana yelled as she got out and chased her.
“DON’T TAKE THE DOWNSTAIRS SHOWER, I LIKE THAT ONE!” Carina yelled going after them.
“Your friends.” Stephanie laughed. “We’re gonna leave now too so we can get back on time.”
“I got time so I’m staying in for a little bit. Try not to be too late!”
We got out and dried off a best we could and headed for the car. As we walked through the house to the front door we witnessed Becky running for her life from Dana but still laughing as Carina followed behind them recording the whole thing. They didn’t even notice we were in the house as they ran upstairs right past us. We laughed as we went back outside through the front door and piled in the car and headed back to our house to get dropped off.
“So was Chris being flirty with Dana or was I just imagining things?” Stephanie asked.
“Nope, you definitely weren’t imagining it, that was good old fashioned flirting,” Rita said.
“What? I was not flirting with her! I poured ice water on her remember!” Chris said.
Stephanie wasn’t convinced. “That’s how you start the flirting, you do something to get their attention and then you build on it, everybody knows that. You were on her the whole time.”
“I was not ‘on her’ the whole time, I was dunking everybody. She almost drowned me at least five times while you were laughing! Help me out Randy…”



F**K. I was hoping he didn’t do that, now I have to pick sides, nothing good ever comes from having to pick sides. “It looked pretty straight forward to me, he didn’t grab her or anything.”
“That we saw. How we know he didn’t cop a feel underwater or something?” Stephanie asked.
“Because her face would’ve gave it away, or when she punched me in the face for doing it. Where’s all this coming from, are you getting jealous Stephanie?” Chris grinned.
“Nooooooo, I’m not getting jealous of a girl with tits bigger than all of ours put together, which we’ve all seen by the way, bouncing them off your head in a tiny bathing suit!”
“Awwwwwww, she’s jealous, the shoe’s finally on the other foot now.”
“What are you talking about, I don’t flirt with anyone!”
“Not consciously at least, but you do. It’s so natural to you that you don’t even know you’re doing it. Remember last week when we went to the store to pick up some stuff for dinner? The cashier was hitting on you and doing that LL Cool J lip thing and you were just soaking it all up.”
“What! That didn’t happen! He told me my dress was nice and I said thanks!”
“Nooooooo, he said your butt0ckz looked nice in that dress and you giggled and did a pirouette, I was right there. I stepped away for a second and you were soaking up the attention, and I’m just gonna forget the guy looked like Bleeping Justin Beiber!”
“That’s not the same Chris. Girls flirt is different than boys flirt.”
“Different as in girls can get away with it and boys can’t? That’s a big difference.”
“Different as in girls mostly do it for the compliments, whereas boys do it to get in their pants.”
“So knowing this you still continued to let him do it, knowing he wanted in your pants?”
“Just because he wanted to get in my pants doesn’t mean I was gonna let him.”
“But you entertained the idea, even right now he probably thinks he still has a chance.”
“Well you don’t give me compliments so I’m happy whenever I get one.”
“What! I do give you… how did this go from you obviously flirting with him to I don’t give you compliments? That’s a classic female turn it around so it’s your fault move!”
“Well it’s true, if you gave me more compliments I wouldn’t have to seek them out.”
“Wha… I don’t! Nope, ok. If you can use that I’m using it too. If you would put your titties on my head more often I wouldn’t have to find somebody to do it.”
“You guys are Bleeping hilarious!” I laughed. “I feel like those Michael Jackson pictures everyone keeps putting on Facebook with him eating the popcorn.”
“Please tell her I wasn’t flirting and she was, she won’t believe it if I say it,” Chris said.
“Yeah Stephanie, he’s actually kinda right, and I don’t say that often,” Rita said.
“You’re supposed to be on my side Rita! How is he right?” Stephanie complained.
“He actually was getting drowned so any body parts he might’ve grabbed was in an attempt to not die, and we were standing there laughing so we can’t fault him for that, and if that store thing happened like that, then you were definitely flirting. Girls are sensitive though Chris, if we can’t get something from our man we look for it somewhere else, it might not be right but that’s how it usually goes, we need to be loved, like I said, we’re sensitive.”
They were both quiet for a minute, Stephanie spoke first. “So yeah. What she said I guess.”




“I knew you weren’t gonna do anything, I was just pointing it out as an example. I couldn’t do anything with Dana anyway, I was too focused on not drowning, she’s pretty damn strong.”
“I thought you were about to say she was pretty, I was gonna jump down your throat again.”
“Nobody’s prettier than you babe. See? I do give you compliments.”
Stephanie tried not to smile but she couldn’t help it. “Jackass.”
“Jackass? That’s a step up from kiss-butt0ckz, you’re making progress Chris!” I laughed.
“And in less time than it took you when you were in my spot,” Chris retaliated.
“I don’t like this new fast response Chris, go back to the nothing to say Chris.”
“Nah I like the new one. Ok we’re here, try not to F**K each other for too long.”
“We makes no promises,” Rita said as we got out and headed for the door.
We went in the house and I went for the bathroom and Rita went to mom and dad’s room, most likely to clean up from us sleeping in there. I turned on the shower and stripped down, we’d taken a shower this morning so basically we were still clean, but you can’t fully wash chlorine off with just water, so I grabbed a bar soap from the cabinet to use, no need to waste good body wash on a clean shower. I ran back to the room and grabbed our towels and sat my phone on the sink and got in the shower just as Rita was coming in. She stripped and got in with me and since we knew we were strapped for time, we didn’t try anything S#xual, we just straight up took a shower.
“Pass me the soap, what is this again, Dove?” Rita asked.
“Yeah, it’s the only one worth using, it actually cleans and doesn’t do that streak thing.”
“OK it was around 4:20 when we got in, we’ll probably be out at like 4:45, that leaves us with fifteen minutes to get dressed and thirty minutes to drive there.”