Oh Brother - Season 1 - Episode 35

Episode 5 years ago

Oh Brother - Season 1 - Episode 35

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Continues..

“I don’t know if it’s because he has the same name as my dad, but I feel really bad for Stefan,” Christian commented, grabbing a handful of popcorn from the bowl I was holding.

“I know.” I sighed. “But Damon. Think of all the pain he’s been through.”

“What about all the pain Stefan’s been through?”
“Well, he’s more attractive than Damon.” I grinned at Christian. “That makes up for everything.”

Christian rolled his eyes and I giggled. Everything felt okay. Just being here like this with him was okay.

Crying to Dee a week ago had really helped me. A part of me had accepted that this was as much as I could ever get from him, and I was okay with it. There were plenty of fish in the sea, so the most I could do was move on from him.

“Are you going to the school dance?” Christian asked, throwing a popcorn at me.

I narrowed my eyes at him and wiped the popcorn away. “Yeah, how about you?”
He nodded, but frowned. “Yeah, but…”
“But?” I raised my eyebrows, intrigued.
“It’s a formal dance, right?”
I nodded.

“Which means we have to do ballroom dancing, right?”

I nodded again.

He sighed. “I don’t know how to ballroom dance.”

“Really?” My eyes widened at Mr. Perfect. “It’s actually not that hard.”
“So you know how to?”
“Yeah, I love it.”

Suddenly he brightened up. His blue eyes shone and I frowned, wondering what would come next.

“Will you teach me how to ballroom dance?” he asked, eyes shining with hope. “Please.”

The question caught me off guard. For a fact, I knew this was a bad idea. I was supposed to be getting over him, which made dancing with him a bad idea. But seeing how he excited he looked, I was left with no choice. I couldn’t bare to reject him.

“Sure,” I replied, looking away as he grinned. “Later though. When our parents are gone.”

“Yeah, for sure.” He chuckled lightly. “Your mom would have a heart attack at the sight of us dancing together.”
I smiled, knowing it was true. My mom would get a heart attack. I knew that ever since Stephen told me that she wasn’t happy with Christian and I getting closer. That was one of the reasons why I knew being with Christian was impossible. My mom would definitely never accept us together.

“Okay, I’ll teach you at around six. Got that?” I eventually said.

He nodded and the excitement I saw on his face was almost painful. Even though a part of me was also excited, I also felt like this was a bad idea. After all the feelings I forced away from him, I had a bad feeling this would bring them back. But, there was nothing I could do

*****

“Why are you wearing heels?” Christian asked, frowning as I walked to the middle of the living room.

“Makes the ballroom dancing more elegant.” I shrugged.

Christian walked towards me with a smile on his face. I wasn’t sure of why he was so excited, but I was glad to see him so happy.
“Well,” he said, stopping in front of me. “At least you’re finally taller than my shoulder.”

I glared at him as he laughed, even though he was right. He was six feet and I was barely five feet. Our height difference was huge, and finally I caught up – a bit.

“Do you want to learn to ballroom dance or not,” I said, grinning as his eyes widened with fear.

“Yes, sorry, don’t be mad,” he quickly said.

With a satisfied smile, I stepped closer to him. My heart was repressing any sort of feelings as I stood near him, but I still couldn’t stop my heart from pounding at the smell of his cologne. It was like a forest – like the forest we hiked in.

“First,” I said, forcing myself to forget about the nice smell. “Put a hand on my waist.”

He did that gently and his eyes softened as I smiled. A part of me was loving this, but the other part of me felt wrong. I hated how I always had an inner war with myself.

“Now I’ll put a hand on your shoulder,” I said, doing that. “And we’ll hold our empty hands together.”

He grinned as we were now in the position to ballroom dance. My smile grew as well, seeing his gorgeous grin. Shaking my head, I knew I had to shower to forget his his touch. Probably in holy water.

“This is the most intimate we’ve been,” he commented, staring right into my eyes as he continued to grin.

I laughed, but blush flooded into my cheeks. That was a total lie, but he didn’t know that. The memory of his birthday party was missing for him.

“Anyways.” I rolled my eyes, trying to get rid of my blush. “Let’s dance.”
I began showing him the moves to ballroom dancing. At first, I had to admit he was terrible. He kept stumbling over his own feet, stepping on mine, and moving in the wrong direction. If it wasn’t so amusing, I might’ve been annoyed by the pain in my toes. But eventually, we got it done. Slowly, but surely.

Christian and I twirled around the living room together. We were only a few inches apart, but that didn’t stop us from grinning at each other. With our eyes bright, I knew he was enjoying this just as much as I was.
After a few minutes of perfect dancing, I stopped in my spot and said, “Okay, enough.”

He pouted. “Aw, really?”
I nodded. “Finally you’ve mastered it.”
“But it’s so much fun!”
“It is, but I’m tired.” My eyes softened as I noticed how disappointed he looked. “Sorry. The dance is tomorrow, you can dance with someone there.”
I was about to let go of his hand and shoulder, and move away, but his grip tightened on me. Looking up at him, frowning, I was surprised to see that he suddenly looked dead serious. Nervousness blossomed in me at that.

“Autumn,” he said, staring at me with eyes that suddenly held affection. “Can I ask you something?”
“Yeah,” I said quietly.

With his blue eyes piercing me, I suddenly felt really nervous. Deep inside I wondered if he figured out that I liked him. It had been obvious when we danced because I had been so happy with my butterflies. So yearning too. Now I was scolding myself as he stared at me.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you this for a while,” he said, suddenly smiling sadly. “It’s been killing me, but I’m scared.”


“You can ask me anything,” I said quietly, wanting to know why he suddenly looked sad. “You know that right?”
“Do you have feelings for me?” The question flew out of his mouth, but his eyes looked so sure of the question.
Horror rose up within me as I became right. He knew. Christian knew that I liked him. I didn’t know what to do now.
“Why are you asking?” I asked, avoiding the question.

“Because I like you.” His eyes softened. “But scratch that question, do you think we would be disgusting together? That if we were a couple, it would be incest. You said it at my birthday, but… I can’t believe it.”

My heart stopped at his confession and by the fact the he remembered his birthday. For so long I wanted to hear that he liked me back. That he had the same affection I had for him. But I wasn’t happy from his confession like I should’ve been.

Christian and I could never be together, which meant he could never feel that way about me. I couldn’t either, which was horrible. But, the thought of incest was worst. I forced myself to think about incest as I fought the urge to confess my own feelings. But something else was also bothering me.
“You remember your birthday?” I asked cautiously as my stomach twisted with nervousness.


He nodded. “Yes, every second of it. Now answer my question… Please.”


His eyes looked almost pleading as he stared at me. I knew he wanted what I said in the past to be a lie. Wanted it untrue like me, but I just couldn’t do it.


“Yeah, it is incest,” I said gently. “Incest is wrong… Disgusting.”


He winced as if I had slapped him, and I found myself feeling the same way. This was wrong. I couldn’t help but feel like this wasn’t the way things should’ve went down.

“Do you really think that?” he asked, eyes expressing pain.

I nodded, looking away. My legs felt limp, but I wanted to run. To run away from this situation that would’ve been perfect if it weren’t for that stupid word.
To my surprise, I realized Christian was moving closer to me as his smell became heavier. With my heart freezing, I realized his chest was right in front of me as he moved his face to the side of mine. His breathing was soft, but it gave me shivers.
“This is wrong, huh?” he whispered into my ear.
At that, I froze. My whole body was warming up at how near he was, and my heart suddenly stopped beating as he placed his lips on my jaw. I loved it when he did that, I realized as I shivered. My heart began pounding again as he trailed his lips along the bone, but my brain was screaming incest. My stupid brain was getting in the way of the his lips on me, but I still felt warmth and lust.
“Does this feel wrong?” he mumbled, sliding his lips onto my neck.
My body was screaming for more as he did that, which made me hate myself. I was supposed to be getting over him, but here I was allowing him to freeze me with his lips.
I closed my eyes as he kept kissing me. Gasping, I moved both of my hands to his shoulders and tightened my grip on him. Even though I was loving this, I wanted more. I just wanted his lips on mine, but my brain was still screaming incest.
As he continued planting kisses on me, my urge for a single kiss grew. I wanted it badly. So badly that my body felt like it was on fire, with only a kiss from Christian to die it down. But even with that, I just couldn’t because of the thought of incest. The thought of being disgusting.


But then, I thought about what Dee said. She told me to aim for happiness. To listen to my heart who wanted nothing more than to kiss Christian. Just once, she told me to give it a chance. To be selfish, and ignore everything else. Only then would I get the closure I needed, and that was exactly why I forgot about my brains screaming. Why I moved my hands to Christian’s face.
Moving away to look at me, Christian asked with his eyes full of lust, “Does this really feel wrong?”

I didn’t answer his question as I brought my lips to his and kissed him. I kissed him as passionately as I wanted to with no regrets. It didn’t feel wrong. It didn’t feel like incest. As his lips moved along mine in perfect sync, I knew that this was right.


I sighed lightly as we kissed. As my whole body relaxed at his lips, I felt a sudden want of taking in as much as I could of him. So for a while, we made out. We kissed as if this would be the last time we’d ever be able to, knowing the possibility of that being true. With smiles in between our kisses, the word incest never occurred to me.
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