On Santa's lap - S01 E05

Story 4 months ago

On Santa's lap - S01 E05

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 5

2 weeks for this story, aiming to get it finished by Jan 6th because that is technically the last day "On the 12th day of Christmas the author gave me, 15 chapters,". Get ready for spam.

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"Oh that's good," Rachel's laughter resembled cackling as she threw in a verbal laughing fit behind me whilst I just gave him a blank stare.

"Oh come on, I don't even get a smile for that? It was good,"

I rolled my eyes pushing past him as I walked back outdoors. I was drenched, hungry and he was coming in between me and my food and that was a big no no.

"Hey you owe me your number," He was quick to follow me out of the place, and I groaned. This was meant to be a fool proof plan, till Rachel burned her apartment down. I stopped, "Fine give me your phone,"

Rachel watched with a raised eyebrow as she flicked her wet pony tail away from her face.

"Password?" I asked as he handed me his iPhone over, "Don't have one,"

Well that's...brave. I unlocked it going straight to contacts, "Hey let me see, what if you give me the wrong number, call yourself,"

"I don't have my phone on me," I replied as I saved it and handed it back smiling at my own plan. "Bye now," I grabbed Rachel's arm pulling her to walk with me. Man I just wanted to eat my damn Nachos.

"Are you going to follow us?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I think as a true gentleman it is my duty to walk two women home, don't you think so?"

"Oh yeah I think so," Rachel replied nodding. I shook my head signing, "We live around the corner, no need," I pulled up the orange blanket that was falling off my shoulder. Well at least it was warm.

The walk was surprisingly fast whilst Rachel and Nik chatted like they were best friends, "Look we're here, you can go now,"

"Nah, I'll walk you up the stairs, I don't trust them because they're always up to something,"

I faltered tripping over, "Did you just do another pun?" I asked irritated. He flashed me a smile while Rachel giggled, "Oh that was good,"

"High five," I watched them high five each other, when did these two get so cosy. Or was I just lacking human conversational skills today. I scoffed, I never had any to begin with.

"Why is there a firetruck?"

"I burned down my kitchen, well not literally, just burnt the sauce and the fire alarms went off,"

Why don't you tell him everything else as well Rach? I opened the door heading up the stairs as I heard Nik speak up again.

"My friend's bakery burned down last night, his business is now toast,"

"What is with you and your puns?"

"What is with you and your fashion garments?" he retorted. I rolled my eyes, "It's from the fire guys," Rach supplied. And finally we reached the tenth floor, my legs aching. I feel sorry for the people on the top floor, good luck getting down and back up after all the fire alarms. That must suck.

Or maybe that's how they kept fit.

"You can go now," I said turning around cutting him off from following us. He placed a hand on his heart frowning, an overused expression lately.

"Aww you shatter my-,"

"Bye," I lifted up my hand wriggling my fingers, "Don't be so rude Eve, he walked us home," Rach whispered in my ear but that was the thing, now he knew where we lived. I grabbed her arm pulling her into her apartment. Firstly she had to clean, secondly I hoped he thought that was my place and not the opposite one, and thirdly my keys were in hers.

STORY CONTINUES BELOW

"I"m hungry," was my vague reply as I sat on her slightly damp couch opening my parcel, her apartment didn't look as bad as I initially thought. It was just the kitchen area that needed a lot of mopping.

"So, who is the hot guy?"

*

There was nothing worse than finding out your monthly gift was here when you were wearing white, and sleeping on white sheets, in the middle of the morning, precisely three am. There was nothing worse than your beautiful sleep being ruined by that feeling.

"You have to be kidding me," I groaned as I switched on the light. Why can't I be a man?

I grabbed the bed sheets, and let's not forget how we had to immediately wash it, or else your wonderful sheets were stained, forever. The horror.

I get that Christmas needed lots of red, but I could do without this type of red. Man mum, why did you own so many damn white bed sheets, why can't you own black or even blue?

Tripping over my shoes and other various items littering the ground I wobbled to the wash room chucking everything in the washing machine and adding lots of surf. Not to mention the early morning shower I had to have.

Whilst the water was warm, I was anything but in the mood to relax into the water. All I wanted was to sleep, but a shower at three in the morning woke me up as I stumbled out grabbing black shorts and a loose big jumper that went past my shorts.

Shoving those into the washing machine I switched it on, to longer than necessary and went to the kitchen.

The desire to eat everything and anything, and lots of sugar was in my mind as I raided my cupboards. Fuck you mother nature.

Should I eat this early?

But I was so damn hungry, not to mention I wanted to bake a cake, yep, that's what I'll do. I will bake a cake while eating warm pancakes with maple syrup.

Man I don't even like pancakes

Well at least I'm not pregnant! Great, my lack of love life was now noted.

"Where the hell is the milk?"

Three hours later I looked at the master piece sitting on my counter top, extremely happy. But also disappointed that the new jar of Nutella was finished, after using it for the cake frosting, and eating spoonfulls, I was feeling a bit too sick from cramming so much sugar into me.

But at least my Ferrero Rocher and nutella cake looked something you can buy.

"Yeah total house wife worthy," I muttered to myself, as I carefully lifted the cake placing it into the fridge. I looked at the time realizing it was only six in the morning, whilst I still felt tired from the lack of sleep, I was still fully awake.

What the hell was I going to do till my weekly brunch date? I looked around the messy apartment wrinkling my nose, oh man, did I have to clean?

*

"Having sex is the only good part about being in a relationship," Chrissie spoke as she stirred more sugar into her three heaped spoonfuls of coffee, how much sugar did someone need.

I just grunted in response as I stared at my hot chocolate, hot chocolate fixed everything, well my stomach was in pain, why can't hot chocolate fix that.

At least this is better than the hot chocolate you had with Nik

Wait, why was I even thinking about that cheap $2 hot chocolate? Or the man I drank it with.

"What's up your arse, someone's grumpy," she spoke and I could see Rachel eyeing me as well from her spot at the other side of the table.

Who the hell thought of these weekly get toget-oh wait, I did. A way to keep in touch. Well I was regretting it now.

"It's too damn early," I muttered as I looked up, and Chrissie's hot pink top was not helping my already sore eyes.

"It's ten..." Chrissie said, finally placing her spoon down, man that coffee had way too much stirring already.

"Yea, too damn early," I snapped grabbing my fork and stabbing my hashbrown.

"Whoa, is someone PMS-ing,"

I froze looking up, well...yes, "No why do you always assume someone is on their effing period when it's just too damn early!" I snapped, loudly, a couple beside us shooting us a look as Rachel cleared her throat slightly amused.

"Okay sor-ry," Chrissie rolled her eyes, going back to discussing relationships and why they were only useful for one thing, but that was Chrissie, the all rounder in our small group. Sometimes I wonder if there is a man in the city she hasn't been with, but we couldn't blame her for her flirtatious lifestyle.

The woman had daddy issues. Which again, can't really blame her. I leaned back into my chair listening around her most recent conquest when Rachel chirped in, the more sober one in our group that balanced us out.

From Chrissie's too active life style to my least active lifestyle, Rachel balanced us, if she wasn't here I was sure I would have already shoved my coffee in Chrissie's face and walked out with my plate of breakfast, only because I paid twenty damn bucks for it.

I clearly did not think about how this weekly outings would affect my wallet before I suggested it. Whilst I always ended up choosing one of the least expensive things on the menu, a habit you pick up from being a poor uni student, at least they always tasted good.

Except today, my eggs tasted too under cooked for my liking, I mean I just couldn't eat it when the yolk was runny, I was sure I told the stupid waiter make it well cooked.

"Eve has a boyfriend,"

Like didn't the egg taste raw and runny with the yolk flying everywhere, how did peop-wait what. My head flew up, the piece of omelette on my fork splatting back onto the plate, "No I don't," I replied.

Since when did I get a boyfriend and why didn't I know about this. Chrissie looked equally as surprised as she looked at me.

"I can see your half eaten granola, eww," I said as she closed her mouth swallowing, "How?"

Yeah how Rachel?

I looked at Rachel, a bit offended that she said "how," um I am sure that I can get a boyfriend if I wanted one. The key words there was if I wanted one, which I don't, but of course it was that time of the month where my hormones were not speaking to my brain and were confused, they wanted one.

I don't, just to clarify.

But my hormones were making my eyes stare at that cute waiter serving the old couple who were glaring at us before, man, he was cute.

"Nik,"

"Oh yeah Nik," I nodded stabbing my food again, "Wait what? Nik is not my boyfriend,"

"Who is Nik?"

Rachel sent me a look, a look that I didn't have time to decide what the hell that meant.

"Look he is not my boyfriend," I said as they both started talking.

"Yeah I don't think he is," Chrissie pipped in popping more food into her stuffed face which I couldn't help glare at, why did that sound like a jab?

"I think he is interested in you though,"

"How do you know that?" I asked spinning my glass around.

"Yeah how do you? Chrissie, pipped in, yet again and I sent her a look. Why did it feel like she was judging me, and there was nothing worse than judging a very hormonal woman right now. Man I wanted passion fruit, why did I feel like passion fruit cake.

Ooh, that would be yummy. Wait, what was I saying before this?

*

Same old same old would be the best way to describe my life as I jumped from foot to foot, man, I needed to pee. Damn it Ash come back from your damn break so I could pee.

It didn't help that there was some stupid bachelors night going on and half the men were naked, having their way too fine body's out to boogie. They should come with a warning, "Hot abs melt in your mouth," not that anyone was eating them.

But they did look like chocolate from here. Damn it hormones, get a grip. It felt like forever, I couldn't even concentrate on pouring drinks but that just made me want to pee even more, before Ash came back and I sighed.

"Is that a new dance move?" she asked as she took her apron back from me and I rolled my eyes, "No it's called pee move," I said as I tried walking around her.

"Hey your phone's ringing didn't you notice?"

"Oh, " I looked at my phone hidden under the counter, not realising it was vibrating.

"Um," I said, "Later,"

"What if it's important?" she asked grabbing my hand.

"Later, man, I need to pee, and holding pee is no way to live life," I said brushing her hand off. Where the hell were the toilets?

There was nothing more amazing than the feeling of an empty bladder, it was like heaven's gift, you can eat more, drink more, dance more, live vivaciously without the fear that laughter would make your pants wet.

So when Mike said someone had to take the drinks over to the half naked men, you guessed it, I volunteered.

And from up front, those shirtless men looked even better, or maybe it was just my hormones speaking.

I filled up another round of shots for them at the counter and looked at the annoying phone. Since when did I become so popular.

I sighed grabbing it and taking a step back, "Hello?" I called out, the music wasn't that loud, who was I kidding, it was loud.

"Saving your name under mum, smart,"

I frowned recognizing the voice, damn it, I swore in my reply which he simply chuckled too, "Who the hell willingly calls their mum?" I said. Well most guys shyed away when their mother called, well maybe I was with the wrong guys.

"No, you have a point, the only problem is I save my mother under Satan, not mum,"

Well crappity crap crap, "Well whatever, I'm working, what the hell do you want?" I snapped.

"What time do you get off work?"

Was that kids in his background? Oh he was probably working as Santa again, stupid festive season, I pulled away quickly to see the time on my phone, "Um an hour, why? Want to buy me shitty hot chocolate again?" I joked.

Ash looked over her shoulder, a raised eyebrow and I waved her off. She grabbed the tray of vodka shots and I rushed over, "No me," I said pulling back the plate.

"No you got to see them up close, my turn," she said, I scoffed, yeah right like I was going to let that happen.

"No I want to buy you some not so shitty dinner," the deeper voice replied from the other side of the phone.