Lust Next Door - S01 E54

Story 4 months ago

Lust Next Door - S01 E54

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 54

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Serena really had no plan.

She ordered the Uber with no real destination in mind, just the certainty that if she didn't leave Citrus Grove for a little, she would be in shambles for the rest of the night.

It was the wee hours of Friday morning, and the only places that were open were gas stations and waffle houses.

Neither of which she wanted to go to.

Serena just put in the address to a park nearby.

The ride was quiet, which she silently thanked her Uber driver (Pierre) for. She wasn't in the mood to talk right now, and judging by the streaks of her makeup all over her face; her driver got that memo too.

When she got there, she was worried it would be gated off, but much to her delight, the giant jungle gym, swings, and open field area were not fenced off.

She thanked Pierre and left him a nice-sized tip before he sped off, leaving her completely alone with her thoughts.

She walked over to the line of still swings, moving into one with a soft sigh. She didn't want to allow herself to think about what just happened, who she saw. She wanted to just be present at the moment she was currently.

That's what her therapist used to recommend when she would have crippling flashbacks and panic attacks. Notice the moment you were in right now; describe what she could feel under her feet, the sensations in her body in such vivid detail he mind had no choice but to be present.

Right now, she felt the harsh press of the plastic swing into her thighs, and her legs felt weightless as they hung just barely above the ground. The wind had a very slight breeze, and it blew over her skin so subtly that she almost didn't notice it. The moon was bright and making her skin look murky. Her head hurt slightly, and the skin around her eyes felt tight from her dried eyes.

But the most overwhelming feeling she felt was the bitter love pouring out of her heart for Connor.

The sadness and heartbreak she felt at the very idea that he let her down, that he was the cause of her past coming into her life now.

She wasn't stupid. Serena knew there was more to the story she probably didn't know. Holes to fill in. She had questions, too. Were they friends? Did he just show up? Why did she have this sinking feeling that no matter how hard she wanted it, no one could keep her safe?

She wanted to be wrapped in Connor's arms again, and she wanted to believe that safety he breathed into her skin. But every time she thought she was accepting it, something happened, and he inadvertently hurt her. Maybe it was a sign from the universe that loving again was a bad idea.

She was starting to think she was allergic to love. Every time she got a taste of it, there were all these bad reactions. Some people, like her, weren't meant to have it.

She pushed her feet into the mulch, making the swing rock back and forth, her face felt heavy, and her whole body was weighted down extra. The frown on her face filled her eyes with water.

She had enough of her thoughts now.

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Serena ordered another Uber and went home about thirty minutes later.

She was dropped off at her house, tentatively looking over to Connor's and seeing the silence that now washed over it. She exhaled a deep breath, and she worried the whole way over that maybe everyone would still be there.

As she walked up to her door, she realized that it was cracked open. Serena was reminded then that she left it unlocked, and her whole body was filled with fear.

Someone could've broken in and robbed her, or worse. Mayo might have run out.

She raced up the steps and into her house, frantically looking around.

That's when she noticed the light coming from her office, and her whole body was filled with a different kind of fear.

Serena walked over to the door like she was stepping across a bed of nails. She had a sinking feeling now that she knew why her door had been open.

And when she looked into the room, her fears had been confirmed.

She stood in the doorway looking at Connor, who was staring in disbelief at her desktop computer.

"What are you doing in here."

Connor looked up instantly, recognizing that broken voice before he saw it.

He seemed to almost jerk forward to run to her, but he stopped himself. He didn't move a muscle, not seeming to recognize the person in front of him.

After he didn't respond, she asked again, a little louder this time and more forceful, "What are you doing in here."

"Looking for you, or I was." Connor said finally, turning her computer screen over towards her, "I found Skylyn instead, though."

Her chest was rising and falling quickly, eyes darting between him and the computer. Everything she had feared avoiding was now coming to fruition like a terrible dream. She felt like her whole body was filled with glass, and her breathing hurt. He knew she was Skylyn, and when she looked at her over at her computer and saw an open email, her expression turned to scornful anger. He snooped.

"You went through my computer?" She snapped, quickly crossing the room to shut the device down. "I can't believe you."

"It was open when I came in here, looking for you, might I add."

She just ignored him, continuing to close tabs and turn off her computer frantically. Skylyn had been her deepest secret since before she ever knew Connor, something she guarded and protected close to her. It was her first success in life, and she fostered that character with every deep trauma in her being. And Connor just ripped open that scab she spent her whole life building, he knew. This felt wrong, felt totally fucked up, and it wasn't how she wanted anyone to know. It was especially not how she wanted him to know.

Connor looked like he wanted to scream as a tight knot felt like it was binding there in her chest. The whole room was caked in tension now. She could tell he was angry and embarrassed, and to top it all off, they both felt betrayed.

"Don't do that, don't drop this fucking bomb on me, and just ignore me." He grabbed her arm and pulled her to face him.

There were tears in her eyes, and her face twisted in nausea, her stomach lurching at the thought that he now knew. To make matters worse, as she feared, he was not happy about it, "I didn't drop anything on you, Connor. You went looking for it. That's not my fault."

"No, Serena, I went looking for you because you scared the living shit out of me. I thought...I thought-" His voice cracked, and the words didn't come out. He couldn't actually speak them aloud, afraid they might somehow make them accurate.

"You promised me, Connor! You promised me that tonight was gonna go well. How- how can you be friends with that animal? Everything he did to me, and to see him there tonight." She brought her shaky hands up to her eyes, furiously wiping the hot tears that were falling.

Even now, she just wanted him to reach up and help her.

"You think I'm friends with him?!" Connor's face looked appalled as he felt that assumption like a shot to his chest. "You must think so low of me. Of course, I'm not. I didn't even know he was coming-"

"Always someone else's fault. What, Josh didn't do a good enough job overseeing the guest list? Last time it was something too, but never your fault. Give me a break."

Connor was really seething now, his voice dripping in sarcasm, "You're being a bitch, Serena. Or should I say Skylyn? Which do you prefer?"

Serena had officially stepped into the fucking twilight zone. Never in her life did she prepare to be referred to as Skylyn by a fan. And instead of the moment being a delightful first that she welcomed when she was ready, it was forced on her, and Connor spat it out in disgust. The person who was supposed to idolize that name apparently suddenly didn't when it was attached to her. It did not feel good.

"Don't fucking call me that. You weren't supposed to know...not like this, at least, but of course, you fucked it all up." She cried, moving away from him now, feeling like her whole body was ripping in two.

"So, what was your grand plan? After I put all of me, every last thing, out in the open. Then you'd decide to tell me the truth. That's when you'd trust me and put yourself out there too, after I'd already done it." He scoffed angrily, pushing a hand over his face, "I feel like a fucking idiot for trusting you."

"The feeling is mutual, Connor."

"Perfect." Connor was pacing around now like his body was charged with lighting.

He stormed over to the door but whipped around to face her again like he couldn't decide if he wanted to stay or leave. "I can't believe you're Skylyn-"

"Yeah, I know it's so wild to imagine." She shrunk into herself, rage and sadness mixing together across her face. Her two worlds crashed in on themselves.

"No, no, don't do that. Let me finish." He growled out through his teeth, "I can't believe you're Skylyn and didn't tell me."

"I don't care what you have to say. You're a sneaky liar."

"I'm the liar?!" Connor yelled, letting out a strained laugh.

She glared at him, her makeup streaming down her face outlining the path of her tears, the ones she was now leaking, following the same path, "Yes, Connor, you are the liar. You want to sit here and condemn me for withholding the truth from you-"

"Withholding the truth is a cute way to say that. You said you were an editor." He spat out.

Serena just kept going, both of them now screaming and interrupting the other, "But every time you've sat there and held and told me you'd protect me, I'm always getting hurt by you."

Serena felt her words like bullets going straight through his heart. It hurt to hear it, hurt to feel, hurt to imagine that he was the villain. Where those bullet holes lay between his chest, she could nearly see the anger oozing back out of them.

He felt the wounds in his heart from her words trying desperately to rebuild a defense after she just ripped his away, and the anger replaced those walls.

Both of them felt stripped of their walls, and now their new defenses were words they didn't mean.

"I hurt you?! Serena, you never leave this house! I couldn't know that asshole would be here tonight, but even if I did, it wouldn't matter. You live in constant fear of him, of everything." They were in each other's faces, firing off evil words trying desperately to hurt the other before one of them crumbled. She was glaring at him now like he meant nothing to her, like there was never a time that these eyes gazed upon him and held anything but unadulterated hatred.

It was pulling her heart down two, and he just kept going, "Your life is just running around with your tail tucked between your legs, scared that he'll pop up anywhere. That is not living; you hurt yourself."

His heart was beating slowly in his chest. The only thing that was weighted in the air was the silence and their breaths. They regretted every word the second it left their mouths, and her brain was kicking her aching heart, telling her how royally they fucked this one up.

She stared at him wide-eyed, tears just silently welling and spilling down her face.

Then it all contorted into a sharp pained look of anger, the wall of china building between them as she took in a deep breath. She made sure her words were clear and powerful and drove like a steak right through his head.

"You are the biggest piece of shit I've ever met, second only to the one you invited to your stupid ass party. I will never trust you again, and I will do everything in my power to avoid wasting another breath on your sorry excuse of an existence. Go back to partying and fucking your life away, Connor."

Serena and Connor were caught somewhere between the threshold of loving and running. Both sides pulled desperately for them and now pulled them apart completely.

That's the dark side of love, Serena realized. It can wrap you up and make you feel swept up into the clouds with baby angels kissing every inch of your skin. It can trick you into being the best version of yourself you could ever achieve.

Or, if you moved the wrong chess piece or picked the wrong person a few too many times, it could leave you so fast that you feel like it ripped your skin off.

"You will have no problems at all with that, shortcake." He hissed out her once-adored nickname like a curse word and walked past out the door without looking back at her once.

Her heart hurt so bad in her chest she thought she might throw up. She had to put her hands over her stomach and let out fast, unsteady breaths she had been fighting to keep in.

Serena managed to keep it together in front of him because having her heart broken by a man she loved twice was one thing, but letting him know that he had done that would just be salt in the wound.

She ran up her stairs and into her room, closing and locking the door quickly so she could properly fall apart, and fall apart she did.

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