My God When - S01 E13

Story 8 months ago

My God When - S01 E13

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 13

When I got to her place, I allowed my tears to flow freely.

There was nothing to hide away from her because I knew she knew about it.

“Didn’t I warn you?” She broke the silence.

“You did, ma”. I managed to reply.

I wept.

If only I had listened to her, I wouldn’t have embarrassed myself.

It was as if I should end my life. I was still rebuking myself for such a stupid action I took when my mentor came to where I sat.

She hugged me.

You could imagine how shocked I was. I never expected her to hug me. I thought she was mad at me.

“Well!” I felt loved. I was forgiven.

“Dear, you’ve learnt another vital lesson.” She said.

She made me to understand that depending on one’s strength to run the Christian race will lead to frustration and embarrassment.

She said our strengths will fail us.

She made me to understand that if I depend on my strength to live a holy and righteous life, falling back into my sin or my vomit is inevitable.

“By your strength shall no man prevail.

To live a holy and righteous life, you need God. You need the grace of God. Remember, God’s grace is sufficient for you.

I know you really loved God but, the adamic nature of sin is still in you. Yes, the garment of bitterness was still on you.

It means, you need God to work on your heart. You need to be sanctified. Yes, being saved alone is not enough.

At salvation, your sins are being washed away. You have that unspeakable joy in your soul.

Have you ever wondered, why after few days of being saved you fall into sin again?

It is because the root of sin hasn’t been removed.

If you cut off a plant without touching the root, what will happen after some days?

It will grow.

So, at salvation, the tree of sin is being cut off. Though, with the root still in the soil.

So, sanctification is needed. That root need to be removed. Yes, a surgical operation must be carried out in your heart.

No wonder Apostle Paul said ” O wretched man that I am, who shall deliver me from the body of this death (sin)?”

I know you are not happy you did that. It wasn’t in your plan to do something like that but, your flesh prevailed.

You flesh is fighting with the Spirit of God. It is either you heed to God or you heed to the devil (flesh).

So dear, in order not to be frustrated in your Christian journey, tell God to work on your heart. Tell him to crucify flesh. Yes, it is impossible for you to please God because your flesh doesn’t want you to do so.

Tell God to search your heart. Tell him to search you in the deepest part of your heart. Tell Him to try your thoughts and see if there be any wicked ways in you. Tell Him to lead you in the way everlasting. Tell Him to purge you.

Tell Him to make you holy.

Remember, it is only the pure in heart that can see God.

Anyone harboring bitterness in his or her heart cannot see God.

Yes, to be sanctified is not difficult. To live a holy and a righteous life is not hard. The grace of God is there for you. Just ask God in prayers. Ask Him to see you through”, She said.

I was in tears. My heart reached out to God. I was groaning in my spirit.

To be sincere, I wish I could be free from sin.

I thought I was free, initially.

I thought I had forgiven him not until that bitterness showed its ugly head .

I was still deeply lost in my thoughts, when my mentor called my name.

“Damilola, at this junction, you need to break the brigde that connects you to your past.

Send a text message to Daniel. Apologize to him for what happened” She said.

I did that immediately. After few hours, he replied me.

” Damilola, I thought you had forgiven me. I never knew you could behave like that. I saw you yesterday, you were happy. I never knew you could behave like that. Nevertheless, I have forgiven you from the depth of my heart. I want you to forgive me for all I’ve put you through. Thanks”.

I read the message out to my mentor. She smiled.

“At this junction, you need to be conscious of what you allow into your heart. Be determined to serve God, no matter what. This can be done by being intentional.

A lady that was once rooted in immorality must be ready to forsake those immoral pictures, videos etc that has been making her to transgress. Yes, she must be intentional about that.

Damilola, delete his number from your phone. Delete all his pictures from your phone. Delete everything, I mean everything that has ever connected you to him. Your man is coming for you, very soon”. She said.

I deleted everything.

But, husband issue was my main problem.

I thought my mentor said “very soon”.