Pride and Ashes - S01 E31

Story 2 years ago

Pride and Ashes - S01 E31

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 31

In which I Run

The sea is nothing but a library 1

of all the tears in history. 18

-Lemony Snicket

I think everyone has a different coping mechanism whenever they arrive at a new place.

Some familiarize themselves with the layout, trying their best to store and know everything about where they are.

Others think it's about the people. That if you make new friends or have people you can talk to and trust, that the newness of the place doesn't seem as bad. 7

For me it was routine.

I needed a routine. 9

I needed to know when I was getting up in the morning, what I was going to wear, where I was going to eat breakfast and what I was going to eat. I needed to know the places I would be going to and the people I would most likely be seeing. I needed routine. Order. Structure.

And that's exactly what the Academy provided.

They had a time for everything.

They had good food. It was standard and most of the time the same, but it was good. 2

They had uniforms, allowing for me to not have the worry of what to choose from to wear and instead blend in with the other students that were attending. 1

And they had classes. Classes that were routine and scheduled and each had a time slot. 20

I quickly adjusted to my new life and found that what I dreaded, was actually not that bad.

I even along the way found some allies.

Allies. 2

That is what they called them at the Academy. Because here you did not make friends. Here you kept in mind that any sort of bond you formed with the others would one day either hurt or help you in your political rule.

"That was a boring lesson," Yasmine said. 21

I looked up from my textbook to glance at her. She and her twin, Jasmine were inseparable and had quickly adopted me into their small group. 37

"I thought so also," Jasmine said. 1

I had been scared of the twins at first when they approached me. Flashbacks to Estella and Anna-lee's treatment of me had me wary of them and why they wanted to be close. 6

But they had only been curious. They wanted to know more about me. And as we started talking and figuring each other out, I realized that I enjoyed their company.

"Stop reading for a second Fayette and join our conversation," Yasmine said. 7

I closed my textbook about chemical compounds and glared at her. "I'm trying to learn."

STORY CONTINUES BELOW

Yasmine rolled her eyes.

"Please, I think after watching you read the whole libraries worth on chemicals and other whatnot stuff, you're an expert in it now." 1

I pressed my lips into a strained line.

They didn't know the real reason why I poured myself over textbooks and hid away during the weekends. I was still looking for the King's solution.

Four months in and I had nothing.

"What is it?" I said, sighing and feeling a slight sense of panic that I wasn't reading.

"I was just commenting on how juicy Lord Julian looked today," Yasmine said, laughing as she rubbed her hands together. 8

I shook my head in mild disgust. "Yasmine, you're engaged to Prince Alrick." A fact I seemed to have to remind her every day of. 12

"Alrick," here Yasmine sighed and looked up at the sky, "if that man wrote even one sentence worth of what your prince did then I would show him some devotion." 8

I blushed at this. Every week Alto sent a new letter in response to my own. It was one of Yasmine's and Jasmine's favorite thing. I jokingly warned Alto that if he didn't let up on his pretty words, I would have competition. I tried to hide the letters from them, saying they were private, but the sisters ignored my request and read them anyway, finding them stashed and hidden away. 79

Alto didn't seem to mind, and sometimes even found it enjoyable that someone else was able to read his love for me. 6

We sat in silence for a while, each lost in our own thoughts. Taking note that the conversation seemed to be over, I reopened my textbook and continued searching.

Several more minutes passed before Jasmine reminded me of the time.

Waving goodbye to the sisters, I rounded the corner, heading to my next lesson.

Some students who knew my name greeted me as I walked. I waved or said hi back.

I entered the room, dropping my bag and the heavy textbooks it held within it. I sighed in relief as the strain of the weight left my shoulders.

"Come in Fayette," I heard a voice say.

Walking further in, I found Lady Cora sitting at her desk. 11

The former Queen. 33

It took me several weeks to figure out who she really was. Most students had a vague idea but didn't know for sure if she was the former scorned Queen.

She kept lessons strictly professional, and never delved into her personal life.

The only time I heard her speak of her former life was when she found out I was Alto's life mate. 5

"I dearly loved that boy," she said, before closing herself off again.

After that encounter though I found that she was kinder towards me than to other students. 1

I sat down on the other side of her and began answering the worksheet.

Simple questions in etiquette.

She broke the silence, "I'm sorry for interrupting Fayette, but you do not look well." I paused in my writing to look up. 5

Her eyes were filled with motherly concern as she stared at me, "have you been sleeping enough? You look tired."

I sighed deeply. The strain of school work and trying to fill out the King's request had taken a toll on my body.

I was thinner. Thinner than even when I was an omega. I rarely slept. I thought that after two months I would have found something. Some small clue. But when the third month came and nothing had surfaced I became borderline obsessed. The signs of my desperation were starting to surface and show. 11

STORY CONTINUES BELOW

The twins were trying to get me out more. Monitoring what I ate. When I slept. Yasmine even threatened to send a message to Alto telling him my state if I didn't start doing something. 4

"I'm fine Lady Cora," I politely said. It ruffled me that she was taking note in my appearance. I would have to put on more blush and maybe some lipstick to get people's attention away from the dark circles I could no longer conceal. 2

"I only worry about your health," she answered, with equal politeness.

I nodded and continued in my work, but felt her eyes burning into me as she watched my painful movements.

"Perhaps because you have been away from your life mate for too long?"

I looked up in confusion but grabbed at the excuse.

"That may be the reason, Lady Cora."

She nodded with sad eyes. "It is hard. If there is anything I can do please let me know."

I tossed her words around within my head. My curiosity won out in the end as I quietly said, "Lady Cora could it be that you...know about the life mates bond?"

Her eyes lit with surprise confusion as she assessed me, "I thought you already knew."

I shook my head slowly, not sure I could handle any more new information.

"I guess the rumor remains that I was banished because of adultery." 6

"You weren't?" I quickly gasped and held my hand to my mouth, "forgive me, Lady Cora, I did not mean to pry."

A small smile played on her lips, "You are forgiven, Fayette. No, I was married to the King, but while I was Queen, a guest came to the palace. I realized as I greeted and welcomed him that he was my life mate. It is the law that you cannot keep a life mate from another, even if you are already married. So the King had no choice but to let me go. However, some of the court gossips started swirling around that I was banished because I had been with another man- since they saw me divorce and leave with another."

Here Lady Cora sighed, "I guess the King made no effort to clear my name within his courts. He was very upset that something of his had been taken away."

I frowned at the idea that the whole kingdom had the wrong information about Lady Cora. If they knew the truth that she had left because she met her true mate- then she would have much more sympathy. As of now though, her name was rarely spoken of in court, and if it was, it was done so in disgust and with mockery.

"I am sorry Lady Cora, that I believed the rumors and lies," I bowed my head slightly and rose to see Lady Cora shrug.

"I am happy here, teaching young royals the life of what to expect in a palace. The King at least provided me with this since I have some experience as a Queen."

I smiled at this.

"I know the strain that can take on your body when your life mate is away Fayette," Lady Cora said, changing topics suddenly, "perhaps Prince August can come and visit?"

I shook my head before she was even done.

"No...I do not want him to be concerned about my appearance."

Lady Cora held her tongue after that. I could feel the burning questions behind her, now that she had revealed her truth to me. She had opened herself up, but I had not done the same. It left some awkwardness in the room.

As I finished the last page and had Lady Cora check on it, I quickly glanced at a nearby clock.

Five.

STORY CONTINUES BELOW

I could eat for maybe ten minutes and then head to the lab. I had no more lessons for the day and had finished most of my work yesterday and this morning.

"Done- all correct Fayette," Lady Cora nodded in approval as I grabbed my bags hurriedly and waved goodbye. "I'll see you next week!" I called out.

I had been taught not to run. That running was improper. That to your subjects who watched, if you ran they themselves were pressed with the issue that something was wrong. And you were never supposed to let them know something was wrong.

But I ran.

Jasmine and Yasmine were sitting at our usual table, two new boys perching next to a flirting Yasmine as Jasmine quietly read and filled out homework.

"Fayette!" Yasmine called out, causing Jasmine to raise her head and give a relieved sigh.

"Here," Jasmine push a tray towards me.

"Thanks," I quickly ate, practically shoving the food down my throat.

"Woohhh, look at her go," one of the boys chuckled, nudging his companion.

Yasmine turned to them and growled, letting her canines descend, "Scram," she growled out.

They quickly got up, casting confused looks at her sudden mood change.

"You really shouldn't be flirting when you're engaged," I said in between bites.

Yasmine sighed and leaned back, "We all can't have the perfect 'bond' like you Fayette."

Jasmine shrugged silently.

"Have you heard from Derek?" Yasmine suddenly asked her sister, directing the conversation away from her. 4

Jasmine looked up and shook her head, "he is still in South America," she whispered.

I nodded in sympathy at Jasmine. She was not marrying a Prince like her sister, but instead his Beta. The two could not bear to be apart, so their father had arranged an Alpha/Beta marriage. Derek though was an explorer and had, according to Yasmine and Jasmine, looked at Jasmine, smelled her neck then nodded his head saying, "she'll do," before heading out to explore the Jungles of South America. He had been there now for almost a year, and Jasmine still had yet to hear one word from him.

"Honestly men," Yasmine said, rolling her eyes.

Jasmine silently nodded her head in agreement.

I finished my food then, pushing back my chair. I felt eyes watching me and looked up to see a concerned Lady Cora, who had just arrived.

She sat down at the head table that was placed in the front of the room. All the teachers and leaders of authority who visited were placed there.

"She's getting on my last nerves," I muttered under my breath to the twins. They quickly darted their eyes to Lady Cora, then back to me. 13

"She's noticing that you're looking like a living skeleton," Yasmine said, "Not very hard to hide."

I scowled at them as they grinned back.

"At least you ate all your food this time," Jasmine said, taking my empty tray and placing it under hers.

"Thanks, Jasmine," I said.

I nodded to Yasmine and then left.

The labs were in another building, one that was more secluded and far out of reach from the main campus. 4

I had quickly found a lab in the beginning few weeks, that no one used.

There I had set up my work. It was the weekend now. I had some food in my bag, and already had a mat and some blankets and pillows placed within the room. This was what my week's end had come to.

I desperately tried to finish my schedule and clear my weekends so that I could devote my whole time to my work.

Opening the room and locking it behind me, I placed my bag down and inspected the liquid that had been on low flames all day.

I tied my hair back, already bracing myself for the long hours of work.