Men Dey Reason - S01 E41

1 week ago

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 41

Monday came with the thought of kpokponity.

“guy, shebi una know say all of una for that

house

na Graduate, na only me still dey look for

Admission, that one no mean say all of una

senior

me oh, i be old man oh, i don write JAMB five

times, this one wey i wan write dis year go

make

am six” Man narrated as we walked to the site

after eating at Mama Calabar canteen.

“e no mean anything na, no worry you go get

am

this year” Brainbox sympatized with Man.

“you be Olodo be that na, no worry na until

JAMB

give u award na that time you go know, if na

kponkpon Exam dem dey write u go pass am” i

dared not say that.

I could still feel the unending burning

sensation in

my neck as a result of the “hot water bath”

Kate

gave us.

We arrived a bit late at the site that morning.

“Old solja good morning” We chorused. “ehen,

unu

good morning” Old solja replied.

“Madam Ifeoma don come, she talk say today

unu

go mould block, say as the casting don finish

make

unu mould block wey unu go use start the body

of

the work” Old solja narrated, “Old solja she

give u

money abi?” the money concious Igbakwambo

asked.

“yes na, she give me money make i pay unu

after

work, she say she dey go somewhere nahim

make

she say make i come watch unu as unu go work

today” Old Solja replied. “but Old solja how

much

be the price to chop one biscuit na?” Man

asked.

“na 20naira for one biscuit na, na the normal

price

wey dem dey pay everywhere na” Old solja

replied.

“Chop biscuit” was the code name for moulding

building blocks. So the amount of biscuit you

“chop” would determine how much you would

smile

home with.

Work started.

Since I and Brainbox were inexperience in

“choping

Biscuit” we teamed up with Man our “Master”.

While Igbakwambo and Ochagbuorie made a

deadly

team.

I and Brianbox were mixing the cement and

sand

with our shovel and pouring it for Man who was

moulding and offloading the blocks.

After about 1hour of hard labour, the half time

Scores was: Team Man 51blocks – Team

Igbakwanbo 62blocks. How on earth can

Igbakwambo and Ochagbuorie be stronger than

three able bodied men? Unless of course they

drank overdose of Tea before coming to work.

Just when i said we needed to increase our

speed,

Old solja glanced at I and Brainbox as we were

practically fighting with our shovel, then he

said,

“Flowa and Brain make unu mix the cement and

sand well well oh”.

“Old Solja our name na Flow and Brainbox, no

be

Flowa and Brain” i corrected.

At the end of the day, Team Igbakwambo won

with

105blocks, while Team Man moulded 86 blocks

only.

Rice and Beans was sure more Lucrative than

Biscuit, or so i thought.

Mixing Rice and Beans was sure more hectic

than

Choping Biscuit, or so i thought.

After the “Biscuit choping”, it was time to

eat, not

to eat Biscuit but to swallow Fufu.

When such urge beckons, the thought of

Soroagwa

came to mind.

The problem that lies ahead was how to share

the

Biscuit money.

“Soroagwa, i want Fufu and Okro soup, u go

mix

am small Egusi, u go com add am small vegetable

soup” Man ordered for almost all the soups in

the

world, i was imagining how the mixture would

look

like.

“ehen Flow take dis 500naira, na ur biscuit

money

be dat” Man said offering me a worn out

500naira

note. “Brainbox na your own be dis” He

offered

Brainbox his own 500naira.

“una know say Biscuit work na nonesense work,

and person no dey use Biscuit work get better

money, if person wan get better money the

person

go mix rice and Beans be that” Man said.

“how much you com collect?” the Brainy

Brainbox

asked “i collect 600naira, i give Old solja 120, u

know say that Man try for us, him no tackle us

like

Madam Ifeoma dey do” Man said. Only God

knows

if he actually gave Old solja the money he said

he

gave him.

“guy my skin don spoil finish oh, see as my skin

white” I complained. “u no dey rob that

vaseline

wey i keep for site?” Man inquired, “i dey rob

am

na” i replied. “no worry, naso e do me when i

just

start kponkpon, e go stop” Man assured.

Soroagwa brought the “concoction”.

The concoction looked mouth watering to me, so

i

ordered, “Soroagwa bring the same thing for

me”,

“na 300naira for a plate if u want the mixture

oh”

Soroagwa said. “no wahala bring am like that,

add

am one bottle of Coke join” I ordered without

thinking.

If my tongue could speak, it would have

attested to

the fact that the concoction was delicious, but

my

prayer was that the concoction should seat

confortably in my stomach.

Legend has it that the first day one eats a

food

that his/her system isn’t used to, there is a

60%

chances that he/she would throw up.

As i continued eating, i wished that i wouldn’t

throw up in the near future. Just a wish, and

like

the saying goes: “if wishes were horses,

beggers

will ride”.

Previous Episode

Men Dey Reason - S01 E40

Next Episode

Men Dey Reason - S01 E42

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