Men Dey Reason - S01 E35

Story 2 years ago

Men Dey Reason - S01 E35

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 35

After Ade finished giving us a nice hair cut and

we paid, it instantly dawned on me that my Biscuit

money was finished. What was suppose to be a

“take home pay” couldn’t even take me half way

home.before i continue happy weekend and happy clean up day for my coolvallers in abia. We arrived the compound to meet a cheerful

atmosphere.

Daniel and David were playing football, Haruna and

his “Miss World” wife were watching over their

wares against any Evil plan of L101 and L102, i

suppose. Not knowing that the L101 and L102

thieves would always take them unaware.

As we stood close to the compound’s gate gisting

with Bigie, someone came in. That someone came

in with an Ape.

What made me realized the “thing” Tupac came in

with wasn’t an Ape was when she said, “hello” to

nobody in particular, “hi” Bigie responded.

As the name “Bigie” was to Stealing, so was the

name “Tupac” to Womanizing.

He could go after anything on skirt, trouser,

b’ombshot and even wrapper.

He could sleep with anyone carrying two “Oranges”

in the chest. Whether the Oranges are Big or

Small, ripe or unripe.

S’ex was the most valueable word in his

dictionary. But not S’ex with an Ape na?

The lady, or rather the Ape Tupac came in with

was very short. She was as dark as my grandmum’s

cooking pot, no “manchester”, no “backassi”.

To crown the whole thing up, she was practically

limping.

“so naso Tupac dey carry anyhow woman?” i said to

Bigie after Tupac left with his Ape, “no oh, him

dey carry fine fine ones sef oh, him wan just

thief the girl Kpomoh chop” Bigie replied with a

smile.

Talking of “thiefing” Kpomoh, i hope the Kpomoh i

kept in my bag haven’t been “thiefed”? I just hope

so.

As we walked to our room, i silently muttered a

prayer to God that my 1500naira should still be in

my bag.

The room was rather silent to our surprise.

We met “the kind” Pkc studying the Bible.

“Pkc where everybody na?” Brainbox asked, “i met

only Baba jay at home when i came, he just left

now, he went to buy drugs for his headache and

body pains” Pkc replied.

“how him no go get headache and body pain, when

Opopo don beat s’hit comot for him body” i thought

with the left side of my brain.

While the right side of my brain told me to quickly

confirm if my money was still in the bag.

I grabbed my bag to confirm. Lo and behold the

money was gone. Bigie had done his worst.

He tore my bag open.

Maybe he was on a revenge mission for the 3k i

stole, or rather, i found in my trouser pocket,

just maybe.

But if you ask me i would say he stole the change

left of his 3k.

Penny wise, Pounds f’oolish.

SCORES: Flow 1 – Bigie 1.***************