Ambrose Goes to Village - S01 E04

9 months ago

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 4

.

I woke up next morning feeling hungry,

which kind winch be this one nah, i tiptoed

to the kitchen to get some food i didt know

my dad was also doing the same following

me from the back immediately i wanted to

deep my hand inside the cupboard, i heard

my name

dad: Ambrose!

Me: turning around with shock, sir

Dad: what are you trying to do?

Me: (see me o wetin person go find come

kitchen if no be food i said in my mind)

nothing sir

dad: for your information today is Sunday so

chill and go and take your bath after we

prepare for church

me: so won’t i eat?

Dad have you even greeted me

me: oh am sorry oga goodmorning

Dad: and have you brushed your teeth

me: yes

Dad: when because i didt see you

me: in my dreams

dad you are not serious young man

me: well no problem daddy, i went and toke

my tooth paste and brush and went outside

to brush my teeth when i noticed that my

neighbour blessing the one that door bell

shocked both of us, i saw her sitting outside

weeping, i Approached her and asked her

the matter she refused at the first place but

when i insisted she told me her boyfriend

broke up with her after having se.x with her

and she’s now sad and heart broken ,

.

I now gave her a clew on what to do so that

she won’t feel the break up alone

.

Did your boyfriend break your heart ? Don’t

bear the heartbreak alone. Call him in the

middle of the night, tell him you went to

hospital to check for your HIV status and the

result came out positive. ask him why he

infected you with the virus and dumped you

. Cut the call at that moment,switch off ur

phone, Relax one corner, open your window

for a fresh air and let your ancestors do the

remaining fight.

.

The girl brightened up and thanked me for

the tip, i smiled and walked back into the

house and prepared for church, after that i

asked my dad

me: daddy which church are we going?

Dad: satanic confrontanity church of Ogboni

me: ohh m be serious nah

dad: i don tell you

me: well since you are comfortable with the

church no problem with me

dad: we are going to Catholic church

me: thank God, i for go Altar Boys practice o

so that i would have serve the mass this

Sunday

dad: you don eat plenty rice with chicken

finish that yesterday, how would you have

remembered?

Me: no vex, we went to church that day after

the service i went to see the Altar Boys, and

we agreed that i would start from the next

Saturday, i went out and joined my dad to

journey back home, when we arrived i ate

my food and served my dad his. After that i

went outside to breath fresh air, like 2

hours later my cousin came in sweating.

Me: why are you sweating like he goat?

Cousin: na you be goat, by The way na this

their masquerade the pursue me from my

house to yours

me: im still dey outside nah

cousin: yes o

me: wait make i carry hot water

cousin: no bother yourself joor, abeg you

don prepare make we the go the wedding i

told you about

me: wait let me wear my shoe

cousin: ok

.

After i finished dressing up me and my

cousin went outside and saw the

masquerade with children dancing round

my own papa compound, i said bia oga

masquerade comot for this place now if… I

was still talking when the masquerade

started chasing both me and my cousin till

we lay ambush for it when he crossed my

path i jumped on it and my cousin did the

same and we removed the mask and snap

him picture we didt beat him shaaa

when we arrived the venue for the wedding

there were still inviting the groom and bride

to the Altar, i said to my cousin

me: oga item 7 never reach

cousin: na so o, them even still the wed

abeg make we go inside

we went inside and found vacancy at the

back and sat down

the vowing was going on suddenly the man

of God asked if there was anyone who had

any reason why the marriage shouldn’t go

on, it was time to stand up and speak, or

forever hold his or her peace. The moment

of utter silence was interrupted by a young

beautiful

woman carrying a child. She

started slowly walking toward

the pastor.

Everything quickly turned to

chaos. The bride slapped the

groom. The groom’s mother

fainted. The groomsmen started

giving each other strange looks

and wondering how best to help

save the situation.

The pastor asked the woman,

“Can you tell us why you came

forward? What do you have to

say?”

The woman replied, “I can’t hear

from the back.” ….

.

Me and my cousins were rolling on the

ground laughing as if we are still very small,

after a while everybody came back and the

wedding was completed and we proceeded

to the main business which is the

entertainment hall…

.

Do you wish to know what really happened

there? I guess yes. Well that will be in the

next funny episode of this comedy series

Previous Episode

Ambrose Goes To Village - S01 E03

Next Episode

Ambrose Goes To Village - S01 E05

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