Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 119
Subtitle: Fu*ck Fakers.
Johannah: am going to meet mom to read me a bedtime story, such a horrible Africa lullaby.
She got down from the bed with her teddy and left the room, I collapsed on the bed and slept off.
A small hand started tapping me awake, I opened my eyes and saw Johannah showing me one of her fingers bandaged.
Johannah: daddy, see.
She pointed at my thumb and I also find the same bandage on my big finger, sleep quickly disappeared from my eyes and I sat up alarmed.
I removed the bandage and saw that nothing happened to my thumb.
Profit: you guys are awake?
Johannah jumped from the bed and ran to her mother.
Johannah: yeah mommy, daddy and I have a bandage in our big fingers.
She looked at me sitting on the bed, she wore a work-out outfit. Which exposed her sexy shape and the amount of flesh on her chest, before my thing misbehaved.
I grabbed my phone from the stool by the side of the bed and switched it on.
Profit: go dress up baby, for fitness exercise.
Johannah: alright mommy, will daddy join us?
Profit: some other time baby, your daddy is kinda of busy.
I switched on my phone and the time showed me 8am, meaning I have overslept again.
Profit came to sit by my side, I stay glued to my phone nervously.
Profit: are you going out today?
Me: I look at her pretty face yes, now sef.
It was like I was bewitched by her pretty face or her pretty eyes, I was just staring at her face ignoring the ringing of my phone.
She leaned forward for a kiss and I captured her natural pink lips, her hand find a way to the back of my head while my hand went for her waist.
Our tongue and lips making a contest, the kiss was like a fine wine to me.
Johannah: daddy, your phone is ringing!!
We broke the kiss and I got up quickly from the bed like fire was set on my bumbum.
Johannah: for what daddy?
My phone rang again it was Ugochukwu, I picked the call while Profit took Johannah away for their work-out.
Ugochukwu’s voice: idiot mumu! where you dey, I dey gate here dey wait for you since!! My fiend before I count of ten you don carry your krokro yansh come here.
Me: I never baf oohh!
Ugochukwu’s voice: you smoke weed? The governor and him wife don already move.
Me: give me ten minutes.
Ugochukwu’s voice: may ten minutes render your amu useless.
I laughed at the call and end it, I went inside the bathroom and took my bath then came back to see the out-fit I wore yesterday undergo a sparkling change.
I wore it quickly and headed to the sitting room so that I can leave, mehnn.. I saw a food-flax kept on the table.
I grabbed it and left Profit’s house, I came out of the gate to see Ugochukwu leaning on the car.
Ugochukwu: you get luck say police no jack me commot from here, I for kill you.
Me: good morning, where we dey go?
We both got inside the car and he mounted the driver’s seat.
Ugochukwu: na your local government.
Me: we fit find our road na.
I opened the food-flax and saw fried rice, so thoughtful of Profit. One thousand yard wife material mehh, Ugochukwu was just licking his lips.
Me: oh boy, close your mouth before you finish the good smell of the food.
Ugochukwu: who cook that food, bro?
Me: na Profit keep am for me, I no know who cook am. But I know it must be delicious.
Ugochukwu: no finish am abeg.
Me: I go only remain for dog.
I started feasting on it, d--n so sweet like her lips when I never brush mouth. Make she no find out sha.
Ugochukwu: bro, problem dey.
Me: which problem dey?
Ugochukwu: na Alicia, she say she get belle.
Me: how, when, who give am belle?
Ugochukwu: she say na me give am the belle.
Me: why na only she say you dey talk, na you give am the belle or not?
Ugochukwu: I no know, my problem be say she say she go scatter the wedding.
Me: why you come dey tell me?
Ugochukwu: you be my only friend, na only you fit advice me.
Me: make we quarantine her.
Me: we go ask some niggars to arrange one room for her, then keep am for there till the wedding finish.
Ugochukwu: that one na kidnap.
Me: you no know before, you get any other solution?
He didn’t say anything, I was gradually finishing the rice. When I finished it I dropped the spoon inside and it made a sweet sound.
Ugochukwu: you don finish the rice?
Ugochukwu: but I say make you remain for me.
Me: umh.. I try, but the food no gree remain.
We got to the centre of my Local Government and asked one or two people to tell us the venue of the rally, we got there.
Voice: do you believe oohh? I believe, I believe what Governor Ekpemaetor has done, I believe what Governor Ekpemaetor has done.