Oga Landlord - S01 E114

Story 3 years ago

Oga Landlord - S01 E114

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 114

Subtitle: Fu*ck Fakers.

Johannah have placed the call on loudspeaker, I heard Profit’s voice.

Profit’s voice: who are you talking to baby?

Johannah’s voice: am testing the mouthpiece, mommy.

She ended the call and I stared at the screen stunned. Thank God this girl no be my pikin, I put my phone inside my trouser side pocket and looked around the place some hookers were looking at me.

I whistled and walked inside the hotel, I went to were Simeon and Ugochukwu were drinking.

Two bottles of beer opened on the table, so na two bottles of beer them carry me come here.

I sighted the table from were I stood on the space were the bar is positioned aside, I was about to climb the three inches height podium when someone climbed the podium before me and headed to the table.

James turned back and saw me.

James: Honourable talk and do, you dey here too?

Me: I dey with James and my paddy man.

James: hope say you don see babe or my arrange for you.

Me: no worry, I no come for babes.

We both went to the table, one guy was dancing anyhow shifting tables with his weight out of drunkenness on the table.

James: Don-Simeon, pass me my bling bling, sharp sharp. I don sight the babe.

Don-Simeon: that one no be issue.

He removed one of the necklace on his neck and gave to James.

Ugochukwu: where you go na?

Me: na Profit pikin call me, na only two bottles ona order since?

Ugochukwu: you don see am, your gee no get money to order fifty bottles.

Me: the kind hungry wey dey catch me here ehnn.. Simeon, where person fit eat for this hotel?

Don-Simeon: na room service oh, if you no lodge them no go give you food oh!

I turned and left the pool side, Ugochukwu ran after me.

Ugochukwu: I no know say hungry dey catch me too.

Me: how you go know? you be married man na, go meet your wife make she cook for you.

Ugochukwu: jealousy jealousy, nothing fit stop our love.

I went inside the hotel and met the receptionist, the lady was just giving me one kind look like ona two be gay.

Receptionist: you are welcome, sir.

Me: ona dey lodge for half-day?

Receptionist: yes, who and you wan lodge?

Ugochukwu: see question, na two of us or you wan join us?

Me: ask am oh!

She shrugged.

Receptionist: alright, sir. No be first time I dey see ona kind.

I no understand wetin she mean, we booked the room and went up to the room, we both entered and went for the telephone.

Me: respect yourself, give me the telephone.

Ugochukwu: I nodey give you.

Me: hope say you come with your ATM card because I no go pay for you.

He touched his pockets and discovered that his ATM cards are not there, he hand over the the telephone and I placed the order of fufu and egusi soup for both of us.

I settled the table before me and adjusted my belt, and anticipated for the food.

Ugochukwu: see the way you prepare like person wey wan go war.

Me: wetin you expect when you don keep me hungry since afternoon?

A lady brought the food and served us, me I no wait make she disappear before I pounced on the food.

After I eat finish I drank the water and rested for some minutes, I ready myself to go sleep for my yard.

Ugochukwu: you wan commot?

Me: you wear eyeglass of blindness? I wan go my yard go sleep.

Both of us left the room and paid the receptionist, two of us walked to my yard. When I got there I saw Teacher sitting on the frontage whistling.

I went inside my room with Ugochukwu and prepare myself for sleep.

I come dey wonder why PHCN no wan bring light, I lay on the bed and slept off.

Around 12:15am Tony started his madness.

Tony’s voice: hello contractor…. Aahhh…. the two million contract…. you don’t have to worry I am engineer Tony…. oh my boys are on it…

Ugochukwu: who dey make call like that?

Me: you dey ask me?

Ugochukwu: person nofit sleep for this your yard in peace?

Tony was making call mentioning billions and millions disturbing everyone’s sleep.

I started hearing loud bangs on his window, Tony became silent immediately.

Ugichukwu: whisper to me wetin dey happen?

Me: I whisper back thieves.

Ugochukwu: Jesus!

Loud voice: open this window!! I will shoot you!!!