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Maraa - Season 1 - Episode 23
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Source: coolval


I heard that down within me but I could say nothing!

I didn’t know how to pray
I didn’t know how to start bringing my allegations against God!
I didn’t know anything!
Nothing at all!

But I felt it deep within me that he could hear me…something told me with all assurance that He wasn’t deaf!
I became quiet and waited
The piano played on sweetly accompanied by the sonorous voice of the pianist
I must tell Jesus!
I must tell Jesus all of my troubles
He is a kind compassionate friend
If I but ask him, he would deliver,
make all my troubles quickly an end.

My heart became swollen within me with every word of the stanza
“I really must tell Jesus” I repeated on and on, my voice waning and fading as I spoke.
My eyes were still shut tightly and my voice scratchy
“If I only ask you, You will deliver Oh Lord…I ask you oh Lord!…I ask you Lord!” I repeated again, my heart’s burden outpouring
I heard that clearly too
Obviously, the Holy Spirit must be praying for me as it is written of Him in Romans 8:26 because hearing those spiritual suggestions sounded surreal to me
What exactly do I really want?

I wanted a lot of things but I had learnt that in asking anything from the Lord, specificity was key!

I’d got to specify
What do I want oh Lord?
I started crying again.
What was I supposed to ask for?
Hannah’s only problem was barrenness and reproach attached to it and she couldn’t voice out her prayers but could only m0aned because of the abundance of bitterness in her heart.

What about me ?
What do I have to say?

That my husband be normalized?
What if he does something worse to me afterwards?
That my children be great?
What if I die and …oh my! What was I supposed to say oh Lord?
The piano started another tune and my heart was overwhelmed in quietness again
“Just as I am- though tossed about
With many a conflict, many a doubt
Fightings and fears within, without
Oh lamb of God, I come, I come!
Oh yes I come Lord!
With many conflicts….down in my life, my heart, my family, my all!

With many doubt in my heart…a lot of them Lord!
I have fightings within me and a great fear lurking around me…
Oh I come…. I come Lord!
I cried out the more
What do you want exactly?
It was precise again and oh yes, what do I want?
The piano started again with the great voice
“I will never let you go, except you bless me…” the voice started again and I accompanied it
If the person couldn’t hear me or couldn’t see me, I didn’t know- I couldn’t say!

All I knew was that whatever it was that he was doing right on the altar was speaking to me too….
The wordings of the song were Jacob’s words
I could remember that story too!
Jacob fought with an angel….he fought!
The voice asked again and I shook my head
That was so true…but what was his request ?
I heard again

I heard it so deeply in my heart and I was aroused in my heart
“Lord, I’ve got to Pray Until your Spirit Hovers over me” I heard the voice of the pianist too
Was he pushing too?
I heard again
Oh my goodness!
That’s the key!

The devil had to just hush and stp the nonsense he had been doing in my life and family.
He’d got to stop!
Teach me to pray Lord!
Help me labor in prayer and until something happens, don’t let me leave Lord!
I am ready to push!
“From today, your name shall no longer be called Jacob but Israel…” those words came like a spire on my ears and I smiled like a warrior that had found out the Achilles’ heels of his opponent.
I now know what to say!
A change of name!
That was all I needed!
“Oh Lord, I am Glory…Ogooluwa is my name. you made me gloriously and anything contrary to Glory in my life isn’t your will for me dear savior”
I swallowed

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