Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

6 years ago

Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

Five days to pass out.

I was walking down the road one evening after taking dinner at an “Iya put” canteen close to the church.

I saw someone. I saw Juliet with a man.

I tot i was dreaming, she was kissing a pot bellied chubby man by the side of a car.
I initially tot it wasn’t Juliet so i came closer and said, “Juliet! What are u doing with this man? U are cheating on me ehn?”.
She didn’t respond but ignored me, so i said, “Juliet! Am i not talking to u?”. The pot bellied man turned and said, “Juliet, who is this j’unkie?”, true talk, i looked like a j’unkie bcos my beard were unkept. “na ur be j’unkie” i thundered. “he is my friend, a corper like me” Juliet said. I didn’t say much, but i just walked out. I knew she was cheating on me all this while. She didn’t even feel remorseful that she was caught. I knew that with the kind of “unconditional” love Juliet had for money, she could even date a pig as long as that pig was money bags.

I called Bad pekin that night for situation report and he told me Tobi had been captured. Bad pekin was happy bcos he was sure of his promotion, but i was happier bcos atleast i could collect my NYSC discharge certificate in peace without fear of been kidnapped on my passing out day.

I needed to say hello to my guys so i went to see them the next morning. Something surprised me, my room had been burgled. My electronics, my clothes, my shoes, even the Flow Bank. All was gone.

I was told Tobi and his guys burgled my room searching for my university statement of result and other important credentials, but since they couldn’t find any, they had to rob the room. I was wise enough to have taken all my credentials along with me to the church.

Another thing that surprised me was that Kelvin’s room was burnt down.

Yes! He almost burnt down the whole house.
Sammy told me that Kelvin was cooking one night(his usual nocturnal cooking), and he slept of forgeting he was cooking. Before people could quench the fire, Kelvin’s room was already burnt down. Lucky enough the inferno didn’t get to other rooms.

According to Sammy, he said all Kelvin’s credentials went with the inferno. Just when i was saying i was lucky Tobi and his guys didn’t get my credentials, the credentials of my friend Kelvin went up in flames.

“what of Angom na?” i asked Sammy curiously. “him still dey station oh, i just dey come from there now, i go give am food”. “what of Ilorin nkor?” i asked again. “him still dey Ilorin oh” Sammy responded.

I took a glimpse at Sammy’s face, the look he wore read: “thank God say me i never get problem like una oh”. What he never knew was that his own problem would be indelible.