Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

Episode 6 years ago

Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

“Ilorin where u dey go?” i inquired as i saw him going out of the compound. “i wan go drink Monkey tail, e be like say i get waist pain” he responded. I left the table tennis i was playing and joined him.

If Monkey tail was to relieve pains, then i sure needed it, bcos i could still feel the pains of the heavy beating i recieved the other day.

Monkey tail is a herbal mixture that is very alcoholic. I had tried it once. It works wonders in relieving waist pain.

“mama Ade abeg give me 3 short” Ilorin ordered. Mama Ade gave him the 3 shorts, and he drank it with all dexterity. “Mama Ade, give me 4 short” i ordered trying to outshine Ilorin bcos his eyeh brothers were there.

As i drank two sips from the big cup Mama Ade used to serve me, something happened. Mama Ade’s monkey tail seems more alcoholic than the one i had drank before.

It was very hot. As it ran down my throat, i tot my throat was melting. “make i no fall my hand oh, make i drink dis monkey tail finish oh” i said to myself as i drank more. I took a quick glimpse at Ilorin and he urged me to drink up. As i drank more, i could feel something inside as if a “Volcano was erupting” in my stomach. Inside of me was as hot as “Molten Magma”.
“Mama Ade, abeg come take this your cup, i no fit finish the Monkey tail wey dey inside” i almost cried out. My eyes were spinning. Profused sweat were goshing out of my body. “make we dey go Flow” Ilorin said after paying for the drink. One thing about me is that anytime i drank alcohol, it would seem as if i had suddenly become a cripple. So i looked at my legs to confirm if it was still there. It was there.

I developed a new walking step. I walked as if i was wearing a “Timberland” shoe when i was only putting on a leather sandal. “why u dey waka like dis na?” Ilorin asked. “ehnnn, u say?” i queried bcos i couldn’t get what he asked, or was it that the Monkey tail had blocked my eardrum?. “i say why u dey waka like dis?” he asked again as my eardrum were now open. “i wan learn how to waka like big man na” i responded and he giggled.

My phone rang, it was Ireti. Initially i tot i saw “eti”, (without the “i” and “r” as the caller, or was it that the Monkey tail made me momentarily long sighted?

Ireti wanted me to come to Blue angels hotel. I knew it was time for “serious business”.

Legend has it that Monkey tail enhances L’ibido. So i was fully ready for the task ahead.