Must Read: The Devil Who Loved Me

Episode 7 years ago

Must Read: The Devil Who Loved Me

I went to Abayomi and Toun’s room after Toun
called me to come. They were eating potato
and fish when I got it with a bottle of Eva wine.


Toun was really spending her father’s guilt
money. From the look of their faces, it was clear
that Toun had appeased Abayomi, one way or
the other. He looked happier and more relaxed.


Their room was extremely cold, so I went under
a duvet and listened to them argue about the
names they would give their children.


I remember when Timi and I did that too. We
had decided that their first name would be
Yoruba while their second name would be Igbo.


Although, I insisted that the first girl will have
an Igbo first name, Timi’s heavenly felattio had
made me agree to all his demands. Those were
cool times. I dialed Naetochukwu’s number.


Naeto: hello
Me: hi, its Tana
Naeto: oh Tana, sorry I didnt know it was you, I
just bought this very cool phone and I haven’t
saved numbers on it yet.


Me: you are a big boy na..how are you and your
people?


Naeto: very fine, how are you, are you around?
Me: not really, but will be back soon, just
wanted to check on you. It’s been a long time
Naeto: na you no get my time now, can we
have a date this week Friday?

Me: I would love that..

After a few more inconsequential talks, I hung
up.


Abayomi didn’t seem impressed, but Toun was
happy, she always thought I should have dated
Naeto instead of Acho.


There was a knock on the door, and when it
was opened, Uche’s tall frame was visible, he
didn’t bother entering..


Uche: we would be hanging out at Cue-Lounge,
not too far from here by 6pm..
Abayomi: cool bro, I actually need to unwind..
Uche: Sparrow will bring you guys
Toun: where is Jafar?i have not seen him since I
came
Uche: he went to Zone 7, he will meet us at the
Lounge by 6pm.
Toun: aii..


He left immediately he passed his message.
Coincidentally my phone beeped. It was a
message from Timi.
Timi = we really need to talk. Just give me a
chance to explain myself; I swear you will see
reasons. You are the one for me!
I went beneath the duvet, shielding myself from
the cold that was making my Tips rocky.
Around 5:30, Toun and I decided to dress up
for the outing. Like a best friend should, toun
had brought some of my clothes for me. I
decided to go with a low necked gown that
would expose some cleavage, and instead of full
pants, I went with a G-string that wouldn’t
leave any p@nty lines. The gown was tight on
the hips, exposing a figure that Toun said was
s*xy**. If my gown was short, Toun’s was shorter
and her height made it more obvious.
Sparrow took us to the Lounge which was
situated in Phase 2, Federal housing, Lugbe.
Shortly after we sat down with Uche, Aji and
Sparrow also seated around us, Jafar entered
with three girls that looked Fulani’ish..
After Toun stood up to Hug him, Abayomi and I
shaked him, he introduced the girls..
Jafar: meet Hauwa, Mariam and Fatima…they
are from Nile University..
The girls greeted us with that exotic accent
that educated Hausa speaking people have. I
have seen fine girls, and I ranked myself among
them, but these girls were spotless.. ..beautiful
and spotless..


But I cant be intimidated….can i?
Drinks were brought in buckets of ice but I was
less interested, I didn’t like the way Fatima kept
whispering in Jafar’s ears. It was not like I was
jealous or something, but she should atleast say
what she wanted to say loud and clear… oya I
was jealous small.
Just when I was calming down, the one called
Mariam decided to talk.
Mariam: Please you guys should spread the
word to all the Kano students in your school,
my dad is gunning for governorship.
It was not like I was from a poor home and all o,
but these entire politician’s children sef
Toun: oh that’s nice although I have few Hausa
friends…
Fatima: but Jafar is Hausa and from Kano, isn’t
he your friend..
There was a deafening silence, I wondered how
Toun would have explained that our host, who
engineered our being in Abuja, was not our
friend..


Jafar: I never told them..
Fatima looked at him and spanked him playfully
like he was a naughty boy. He smiled at her
too..
Me: he actually told him he was from Kano
Jafar looked at me, puzzled with the point I was
trying to prove. I smiled as I looked at Fatima.
Me: we were preparing his favorite meal, Yam
and egg when he told me..
Fatima: awwww, Jafar is such a homely guy. He
seldom eats outside. I taught him how to
prepare the yam and egg just the way he likes
it. Did you know just the right amount of onions
to slice?
Me: yes!



My answer was a bit too loud. Fatima and I were
not fooling anyone around the table, this was
beyond Yam and egg. Thankfully Uche broke
the façade
Uche: their peppersoup here is mad!.. cow-tail,
intestines, chicken..


Abayomi and Toun that had been relatively
quiet opted for cow-tail, Hauwa and Mariam
went for Chicken, instead of Fatima to other for
herself, she asked for two plates of cat- fish for
her and Jafar
Me: make it three plates, I want cat-fish
I wondered why it didn’t come earlier but when
it did, Toun’s laughter was sonorous. I was a
little embarrassed but I kept a straight face. I
didn’t know what was wrong with me, with all
the Timi drama and having told myself that
Jafar and I were in parallel universe, I didn’t like
Fatima claiming him.



The drinks were served chilled; the Hausa girls
went for Malta-guiness while Toun and I took
our normal Gordon-spark. The stupidly pretty
one among them called Mariam gave us this
condescending look as we sipped our drinks.
Abayomi and Uche discussed about something
that was very interesting to both of them.
Sparrow and Aji were trying to impress Toun
with the amount of bottles they could drink.



The three Hausa girls were all over Jafar, telling
him what has been happening to guys he knew
who attend Nile University. I was left alone with
my thoughts.


Some minutes past 8pm, Jafar went to his car
and came back with a shisha jar, chocolate
flavor and coal were also available. Though I
hadn’t smoked shisha before, I pretended I
had. As we passed the pipe between each
other, I couldn’t help but notice that after Jafar
smoked, he passed the pipe to Fatima, who
rubbed her lips on the mouth of the pipe. I
wondered how nice it would have been if I was
the one passing the pipe to Jafar. I wondered if
he would smack his lips. Okay I was getting silly
and Toun’s disciplinary stare told me she could
guess what I was thinking. I held on to my
Gordon-spark…I didn’t smoke with them
anymore.