Must Read: To Love And To Leave

Episode 7 years ago

Must Read: To Love And To Leave

I’ve been home all day, packing my bags and provisions. I have more things to take to school, Thanks to Mr. Olatunji Adeleke i got a bigger wardrobe, new clothes, new years and a larger allowance money. Seems like i have all except one thing…. Bidemi.


I knew i have to see her before i leave tomorrow, if not for anything, i have to tell her how sorry i am for telling her to give me some space.


I wasted no time in getting dressed and finding my way to her gate. I knocked and Abdul, their gatekeeper opened it and led me in…. I met Kikelomo in the sitting, she didn’t say a word, she just smiled and pointed me towards Bidemi’s room.

I summoned all my courage to knock on her door….. Come in….. her voice was low and husky.


She almost jumped out of her skin when i opened the door and stepped in.


Me: Good afternoon Bidemi.
Bidemi: What do you want Dolapo?
Me: I came to see you….
Bidemi: Oh! And why would you wanna see me?
Me: Look …Bidemi, we don’t have to do this, we don’t have to fight…. I’m leaving for school tomorrow and i don’t want to leave this way….
Bidemi: Oh! Because you’re going back to school, that’s why you’re here?? Good! I’ve heard you. Thanks for letting me know. Is there anything else?
Me: Yes!
Bidemi: What is it?
Me: I love you!

I let the words hang in the air for a while. She widened her gaze and for a moment, it looked like she was going to smile until she frowned and snapped at me.
Bidemi: Is that a joke? You practically chased me out of your life like i was a plague and now you’re here, telling me you love me…
Me: i hard alot going on Bidemi…i didn’t wanna get you mixed up in the whole thing. It was a hard time…
Bidemi: During the hard times are when we need people we love the most…. not time to push people away. Face it Dolapo… you didn’t need me in your life and that was why it was so easy for you to leave me…
Me: No! I care so much about you, i didn’t want you to worry about me. I left you bacause i love you…..
Bidemi: How stupid is it for you to love and leave someone??
Me: Apparently, very stupid. But I’m here now….i realised and I’m sorry! I want you back Bidemi…
Bidemi: I’m not just a thing… I’m a person… all my life I’ve always been treated as an option by the people i love. I was dumb in the middle while Femi and my Sister were having s*x behind my back, I’ve watched as you and Femi decide on who should date me like i don’t have a mind of my own, you had me and then you decided to kick me out of your life just when you felt like…. I have to make a statement for myself… I’m tired of being treated like a thing rather than a person, I’m not your Toy, you can’t just decide when you want me around and when you don’t….


Me; But Bidemi…..
Bidemi: (cuts in) Go back to school Dolapo… I’ve gotten an admission too and I’m resuming tomorrow too. Let’s just forget everything that happened and move on with our lives..
Me: Congratulations on your admission.
Bidemi: Thank you!
Me: What school were you admitted to?
Bidemi: (Sighs)….. You have to leave now, i believe we’ve both made our points here.
Me:Bidemi please come back to me….
Bidemi: Why would i wanna do that?
Me: Because i love you!
Bidemi: I’m sorry i can’t, please leave now.
Me: Do you still love me?
Bidemi: No
Me: What??
Bidemi: Please Dolapo…. Please leave.


I dropped my shoulder in defeat, absolutely dejected. I tried moving towards her but the jerked back. I realised there was nothing left to do than leave. I turned around and began to walk out, i looked back for one last view, i caught her eyes but she quickly looked away and there at that moment, i realised i had lost the girl that meant the world to me. I stepped out of her room and gently closed the door behind me. I started walking off as my heart beat faster and ached with every beat. Behind the door, in her room, i heard her gave out a low cry, she cried even louder when i got to the stairs, it was then i realised i had tears in my eyes too.