Must Read: A Simple Life On Paper - Season 1 - Episode 15

7 years ago

Must Read: A Simple Life On Paper - Season 1 - Episode 15

I packed my bag and headed back home. The peak of the
day for me was seeing Rahina after such a long time.

Greg getting a whooping would have been it, but I didn’t
really witness it.

At home, Tintin wasn’t back (her car wasn’t in the
driveway). I had my shower, nuked a leftover and went to
bed for a well-deserved nap.

Sleeping is a precious commodity to me and the best
way to enjoy it is for at least three hours. With that in
mind, I was painfully dragged back to consciousness by
a steady and determined knock on my door after just two
hours of sleep.

The rage in my face lost all motivation at the sight of
Rahina and Tinuke’s beaming faces as they ushered
themselves in. They looked comfortable as Tintin made a
beeline for my kitchen while Rahina plumped on my
couch and started handling my remote. I was still
standing by the door and they didn’t even say a word to
me!

By the time Tintin came back to the living room with two
plates of food, Rahina gone through all the cable
channels and was playing Hitman on the x-box. Still, no
one said a word to me!

It was after the meal that Tintin started asking me
questions about Pamela. Things like if we were still
together, why we broke up, was I sure it was not just a
hoax, have I tried to get in touch with her since…pretty
much every question you can imagine that would tick
you off some more about an ex.

I reckoned Rahina had covered the shameless way I was
in love during my undergraduate days and was expecting
the romance would last forever. So I could see the
shocked expressions on their faces as I narrated how
Pamela would take a weekend every month to go back
home to Yala in Cross Rivers state but one month, didn’t
make it back. She claimed to be feeling sick at one point,
after two weeks back home, said she was on admission
at a hospital over there. I had kept transferring funds to
her account so as to help cover the bills and made plans
to go down to meet her and get a full picture of what was
going on. Two days to my expected departure date (on a
Sunday), I get tagged in fifteen pictures that covered in
brilliant imagery; Pamela’s wedding to a handsome
young man named Christopher.

At this point of my narration, Rahina’s eyes were getting
red and Tintin was calling on the son of the creator with
greater frequency. I was surprised that I had no
emotional response to the story I was telling.
I continued to tell them how Claudette (Pam’s cousin
who tagged me) went on to tell me how disappointed she
was in me for not attending. She saw no reason why I
wouldn’t take a weekend off to attend since she had to
pull strings to rearrange her flight schedules (she is an
air hostess) so that she would be in Nigeria for Pam’s
wedding.

I couldn’t muster a single word to my defence.

She felt
obliged to then type out her admiration of Pamela’s
romantic relationship and how it had romantically started
in secondary school, how they went through thick and
thin and even the strains of a long distance relationship
could not deter the flare they had for each other and how
they made a cute couple. That was the longest thirty-
minute chat of my entire existence.

At the peak of my depression, I tried on number times to
get in touch with Pam but the one and only time my call
was answered; Christopher threatened to cut off my head
if I didn’t stop stalking his wife. I surrendered and tried
my hardest to get my pathetic life back to normal.