[Story] Love, Lust And Lost

8 years ago

[Story] Love, Lust And Lost

The class was reeling in laughter. Those types of laughter that made one cry at the same time laugh. Mr Afeez his colleague made the wrong move that got Mr. John enraged the more. He was still laughing and wiping his tears when his hysteria got him to the side of Mr. John and he held him across his shoulder jokingly, not knowing he had vexed him the more.

Mr. John walked out of the class and about 5minutes, he returned with 10 canes, you easily know he had selected them in the group of 5-thin and 5-fat canes, though they were bundled together in his hands.

“Come out here, you fool!.” And the class went silent as though the president and his cabinet were visiting.

“I said come out here!” He repeated with his eyes boiling red in his nerd spec.

Kazeem’s countenance appeared to have changed from `tears-of-joy’ to `tears-of-sorrow’.

His emotions and steps were like that of a tortoise. It was dodgy, sluggish as though it were planning some evil in his heart. His movement was slow, snail would walk faster than he, in a race.
The sweat that formed in his face made the students laugh but this time, it was very silent, seemed a smile.

“Lie down flat on that desk.” Mr john commanded and Kazeem fearfully looking backwards with his hands placed at the edge of the desk on the front; his zip in contact with the near-edge of the desk and his chest shot-out like those scouts on Children’s Day parade or Independence Day at the police college.

The first stroke that landed on his back after he had managed to lay on the desk came in form of a question “kpa kpa kpa kpa, what did you say?” The cane sounded.

“Mr. John is a Receptionist sir” he repeated groaning.

The process continued with laughter coming from the students and other passers-by students who had been walking pass the corridor and had decided to wait and watch the drama unfold.

`kpa’ it landed again with the question.

Kazeem exclaimed “Receptionist” his tone changed when Mr. John made it land on his backbone repeatedly.

“Receptionist o, Chai!. I don suffer today o.”

“Recep o sir, ye!!!”

“What did you just say?” Mr. John who was sweating already asked, his face now very angry.

`kpa’ it sounded “I don die for Receptionist hands o” he exclaimed. What sort of guts could have made this funny man say jargons out of his mouth?. The cane that inflicted pain on him or what?.

The class could not help but laugh at the moron who looked like a comedian. His stature was exactly that of Julius Agwu, though he was a Benin boy.

“You die for where?” Mr. John asked.

“Receptionist sir. Sir na Receptionist sir” he was unsteady on the desk he lay as the cane was still landing on him as the questions were rolling out. “Recept me Sir, abeggi sir, Recept me”

“Recept you what???” Mr. John was totally clueless at what Kazeem was driving at or trying to say.

If Kazeem had stop saying what Mr. John didn’t want to hear, it would have saved him from the mess he was going through.

The class was already disorganized, students were scattered here and there, rolling on the floor laughing at the madness Kazeem and the NYSC teacher were displaying. Some were cry-laughing, some hitting their desk out of control, stamping their feet on the floor. This was more than Night of a Thousand Laugh.

“Receptionist don kill my real life o” Kazeem worsened everything saying that.

“You still saying that, will you shut your mouth?”

But rather, he said it in a more refined pattern “You have killed me o, Mr. Receptionist!”

To Be Continued….