Choose - Season 1 - Episode 75

Episode 4 years ago

Choose - Season 1 - Episode 75

…
The movie credits come on and Calum flicks on the lights.

“You guys up for another movie?” Calum asks.

Luke looks at me but I subtly shake my head.
“Nah, man. I’m really tired. I think i’m going to head home.” Luke says.
“May, Ash, how about you guys?” Calum asks.

“Uhh..” I start.
Calum chuckles then nods his head. “Right, Luke’s leaving.”
“No it’s not that, i’m just really tired, too.” I say honestly.
He nods his head. “Okay.”

I stand up and shake the crumbs off my shirt that collected while eating tons of junk food during the movie. Luke stands up and does the same.

“You guys can take my car.” Calum says, reaching into his pocket to grab the keys and tossing them to Luke.

“No man it’s fine, we can walk.” Luke says as he catches the keys.
“Nah seriously it’s cool. I don’t have anywhere to be tonight anyways. Just bring it back tomorrow.” Calum tells us.
“Thanks, Cal.” I smile. I really am tired and walking home would not be my first choice.
Luke and I walk over to the entrance and slip on our shoes. We open the door to leave when Calum stops us.
“Oh, wait a sec.” Calum says.
We turn around to face him.
“My mom’s having some sort of this dinner party for my parent’s twentieth anniversary tomorrow night. Can you guys all come? It’s at eight and I really don’t want to surrounded by a bunch of old people all night.”

“Yeah, sure!” I say.
“Okay, it’s black tie by the way.” He says.
Luke groans. “Forget it, i’m not going.”
“Yes you are.” I say, looking up at him.
“No i’m not.” Luke mumbles.
Calum looks at me, desperate for me to get Luke to come.
“We’ll be here at eight.” I assure him as I take Luke’s hand in mine and walk out the door.

I get in the passenger seat of the car and Luke gets in the driver.

“We’re going to that party.” I tell Luke after several minutes of silence.
I know Luke wants to go, he just loves to be difficult.

“You know I hate dressing up.”
“Please? For me?” I say, putting my hand on his arm.

He glances at me before returning his eyes to the road.
“We’ll see.”
“Come on, please?” I ask again, more whiney this time.

“We’ll see, May.” He says again, more sternly this time.

I huff as I cross my arms and slouch into my seat immaturely.

Several minutes later we pull into my apartment building driveway. I unbuckle my seatbelt and start to get out of the car.
“No kiss?” Luke asks.
I bend back down and look at him. “I thought you were coming upstairs?”
“Oh.” Luke says as he turns the car off and gets out of the car.
He takes my hand in his as we get in the elevator to go upstairs. We get to my apartment and I turn the key to open the door. I walk into my bedroom, Luke following me. We both sit on my bed as I open my laptop up and go onto video chat. I click Michael’s name and watch as it rings……… “You’re calling Michael?” Luke asks.
I nod my head. “Yeah, I thought you’d want to say hi to him seeing as you both haven’t talked much since he’s been gone.”

“Yeah, I know we haven’t really. It’s just that talking to him makes me remember that you’re going to be exactly where he is in just a few months while i’m all the way on the other side of the world.” Luke says, gradually lowering his voice.
“Luke why can-” I begin before the ringing stops and I see Michael’s face appear on the screen.

“Hey.” Michael says, rubbing his eyes.
“What’s up with you?” I chuckle.
“I was sleeping. It’s like four in the morning right now.” Michael say sleepily.
“Oh, right! I’m so sorry Mikey, I totally forgot about the timezones!” I tell him.
Maybe getting used to all of this was harder than I was making it out to be. I’m still so stuck in my old life routine that I can’t seem to latch onto my new one. I feel as if i’m just video chatting Michael while he’s in the other room. Only he’s not. He’s on the other side of the world.
“It’s okay.” Michael says as he opens his eyes wider, realizing Luke. “Luke! Holy s--t I haven’t seen your ugly a-s face in weeks!”
Luke chuckles. “I know, man! I miss your bright a-s blinding hair.”

I debate on staying or leaving the room. Maybe Luke and Michael should have a conversation without me here, only i’m too selfish to leave. I miss Michael too much to leave.

“How’s Penn?” Luke asks him.
“It’s good! I’ve become good friends with this kid, Dom in my psych class. He’s hilarious!” Michael says.
Luke looks down. He obviously misses Michael a lot and I mentally slap Michael through the screen for bringing up the new friends that he’s making. The last thing Luke needs is to move to England in a few months knowing his best friend has a new best friend.
Michael’s facial expression changes as he must have caught on to Luke.
“I miss you and the guys though! S--t isn’t the same without you all. Like, parties here aren’t even that great. Cora and I mostly stay home.” Michael says. I can tell he’s probably not telling the whole truth, but i’m glad that he’s trying to say anything possible to make Luke feel better.
Luke laughs. “Bullshit! American college parties are sick, don’t even try to pull that on me.”

Michael laughs too. “Alright, you caught me. The parties are out of control, man. You guys need to come visit soon.”
Smooth Michael.

“Well, I mean like when you come visit May while she’s here once you move to England and―” Michael tries to explain but probably realizes that what he’s saying really isn’t helping anyone. “I’m gonna shut up now.”

“Good choice.” I huff.
“Sorry.” Michael apologizes.
“Does Cora like it there?” Luke quickly changes the topic.
“Honestly,” Michael starts as he looks over at Cora obviously lying beside him then looks back to the computer screen, lowering his voice. “I can tell she really misses Australia. She’s trying to put on a brave face and act as if America is the greatest thing that’s ever happened to her, but I know she misses home.”

I sigh. I hope that’s not what i’m going to feel like once i’m there. I hope that’s not what Luke is going to feel like once he’s in England.

“I’m sure she just needs time to adjust to everything. Has she made any friends there?” I ask………… “Well, she claims that she’s friends with this sixty something year old woman she works with.” Michael rolls his eyes. Luke and I laugh.
“At least you’ll be here in a few months. She’s really in need of someone she knows. And someone that’s around her own age. Jeez July really needs to come faster because―”

I widen my eyes, signalling Michael to shut up. He seems to get the hint.
“S--t i’m sorry―again. I literally just woke up so my brain is still half asleep.” Michael half laughs.

“Go back to sleep, Mikey. I’ll call you tomorrow.” I say.
“Okay. Night guys.” Michael says as he hangs up.

I shut my laptop and lean over to put it on my bedside table. I lay down, Luke lying beside me. I lay in his arms for what feels like hours, in pure silence. I can’t stop thinking about the move now thanks to Michael, and I can tell that Luke’s thoughts are probably the same as mine. I decide to speak up to try and get his and my mind off of it.
“Should I wear the purple or black dress for the dinner party tomorrow night?” I ask.
“Purple. You look really sexy in that purple dress.” He says, kissing the top of my head.
“Well you don’t look too bad in a suit.” I smile, even though he can’t see my face.
“I’m not wearing a suit, May.” Luke groans.
“Please, Luke? It means a lot to Calum that we go. We’re his friends and he asked us, so we’re going.” I say.
“No.” Luke says.
“Please.” I whine, extending the word for dramatic affect.

“You know I hate dressing up though.” Luke practically whines himself.
“If you dress up tomorrow, i’ll dress down right now.” I say, looking up at him through my lashes.
He looks at me with a growing smirk on his face. “I’ll take that deal.”
I smirk back at him and get off the bed. I walk into the bathroom, swinging my hips more dramatically than usual.
I run the bath as I put bubble bath in it and take off my clothes, leaving them in a pile on the ground. I shut off the tap and get into the bath. I lean my head back ready to relax, when I hear a knock on the door.
“Mind if I join?” Luke asks as he opens the door.
“What’s the point of knocking if you just open the door straight away anyways?” I giggle.

“My mum always taught me knocking is respectful.” Luke laughs.
“Yeah, so is waiting for someone to open the door.” I laugh too, obviously joking around with him.

“Sorry, I couldn’t wait. All I could think about was you naked in the bath and my patience disappeared.” Luke says, eyeing my body, even though its covered by the bubbles.

“Well what are you waiting for?” I say.
He smirks as he quickly takes his clothes off and gets in the tub, opposite of me. I move so that i’m in between his legs, my back resting on his chest.

We stay in silence for a while, before Luke speaks up.

“Can I be honest about something?” Luke asks.

“The boner you have isn’t a secret, Luke.” I laugh as I shake my head, my eyes still closed.

“Not that! I’m being serious.”
Oh.

“Okay, sorry.” I say, more serious this time.
“I’m scared.” He blurts out.
I open my eyes and spin around to face him. “Scared of what?” I ask.
“Being without you.” He says, looking at me directly in the eyes.
I sigh and lower my head. “Me too.”
“I can’t even go a day without seeing you. How am I supposed to handle months at a time?”

“I don’t know, Luke.” I tell him honestly.
I honestly don’t know how we’re both going to handle this. We’re both such a huge part of each other’s lives, that being without one another is such a drastic concept to grasp.

“I know where we’re each going is best for both of us but, what will we lose in the process?” Luke says, his voice brittle.
I cup my hands on his face. “We’re not going to lose anything, Luke. This right here, it’s forever. Do you get that? I’m never going to leave you.” I assure him.
“I know, and that’s what i’m afraid of.” He mumbles.

“You’ve said that before. What’s that supposed to mean?” I ask.
He shrugs. “I know you’ll never leave me. And no matter how unhappy you’ll be, you’ll act as if you’re not because you’d do anything for us to not break up. Michael was right.”

My eyebrows knit. “What do you mean Michael was right? What did he say to you?”
“Exactly that. He told me that you’ll never leave me and that you’d rather be in pain everyday than be without me. But knowing you’re unhappy will rip me to shreds.” Luke says.
“Michael doesn’t know anything about our relationship! Yeah it’s not going to be easy, but it doesn’t need to be. I love you and you love me, that’s all that matters. We’ll find a way for everything else.” I tell him.
I don’t know why Michael is putting stuff in Luke’s head about this whole situation. It’s honestly between Luke and I and even though Michael was probably trying to help in some way, it almost made things worse.

“Promise, baby?”
“Of course I do, Luke.” I say as I press my lips to his before returning to my previous position of resting on him.

Of course i’m going to be upset and sad without Luke everyday, but i’m just hoping that each day will get slightly easier. But as much as I try to deny it, there really is no denying the fact that without Luke, my life is just a ball of pain. Before Luke, I the worst person I could have possibly been. But once I met Luke, he changed something in me. He made me happy to be alive. He made me see every little thing in a completely different perspective from how I used to. I’m just terrified of how i’ll be after he moves away………….
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