Story: The Church Accountant (+18) - Season 3 - Episode 24

7 years ago

Story: The Church Accountant (+18) - Season 3 - Episode 24

Kolade: olobe ni e. ever since you moved to Mrs. Adedokun place, you have never had the time to pay me visits like before.

Me: ma binu. You know the schedule of work and Nike is always around.

Kolade: but at least we would have met here

Me: ma binu ore.

Kolade: I called you because I heard some “truths” about you and I want to confirm if it is true.

Me: what did you hear about me?

Kolade: how you have been banging Mrs. Adedokun times without number and……

Me: can you keep a secret ore? Because the day you reveal it, I will skin you alive in the presence of Nike and everyone.

Kolade: skin me? In front of Nike?

Me: don’t you think I don’t know about Bolaji and Tunmise

Kolade: the day you tell Nike about them, ma pa e

We both laughed

Me: truly I have been having s3xual relationship with Mrs. Adedokun

Kolade: EKUN!!! The Badoski himself. O mu nnkan s’enu se’nu wuye (pretender of the highest order)

Me: even with Ifeoma…….

Kolade: ah!!!! So you have gone this far with these two women? Baddest boy ever liveth (he shook my hands) get ready for the fight of vipers and anacondas when the truth spills out. What about Titi?

Me: she is leaving for UK immediately after Youth Service for her Masters. And I observed that she already has someone she’s dating over there.

Kolade: o ga o. so if she discovers that you are already bleeping her sister – in – laws, what will she do?

Me: even before she discovers, I have already decided to hang the boot with those two women especially Mrs. Adedokun.

Kolade: I will even suggest, you leave that compound as soon as possible for your own safety.

As we were talking, Mrs. Adedokun call came in

Me: that’s she calling

Kolade: who?

Me: Mrs. Adedokun

Kolade: don’t pick her call. Start creating artificial scarcity in that house so that they won’t put you in trouble.

Me: do you know that I bleep Mercy and Kafeeya also

Kolade: which Mercy and Kafeeya?

Me: Mercy – Church Office cleaner and Kafeeya – in the Choir.

Kolade: MIKE!!! (shook his head in disbelief) you are mad. You finally screwed Kafeeya – that lady who use to form big girl in the choir. I will have to report you to the Pastor.

Me: report to him and I will gladly report to Nike. And we will see who will lose at the
end.

We both laughed

Kolade: Mike, please be very careful o. Kafeeya is not a person everyone thinks she is.

Me: how?

Kolade: do you know that she has a daughter?

Me: I know. Her name is Praise.

Kolade: o ti e mo dada (you know her well). She had a fling with one honourable some years back and it resulted into pregnancy. As soon as the man knew she was pregnant, he gave her the sum of 3 million Naira and disappeared into the thin air. So no man has approached her. I even wanted to move close to her but she rebuffed my advances and almost nailed me in front of the Senior Pastor.

Me: so ore, what should I do?

We discussed at length on what to do. At the time we were discussing, Mrs. Adedokun kept on calling my line. After much exasperation, I decided to pick her line and I placed it on speaker

Mrs. Adedokun: Mike, where did you keep your phone all this while?

Me: I wasn’t with my phone and I was charging it.

Mrs. Adedokun: (sexily) Mike I need you now

Me: ma, you know I told you that it won’t be possible. I don’t want to hurt Titilayo and hurt you too.

Mrs. Adedokun: I have prepared dinner for you and the other dinner too is waiting.

Please don’t let it get cold.

Me: hmmm……

Mrs. Adedokun: I will be waiting. (call ends)

Kolade: to – to bee ni? (Has it gotten to this extent?)

Me: Koolberry I am fed up. I still ask myself how I got into this mess

Kolade: you won’t know…. When you always dress to kill and all ladies are fighting to get you.

Me: o ga ooo…..

After gisting for a while and strategizing, I left for the house. As soon as I got into the compound, I was hearing voices of Segun and Dolapo. I was greatly relieved because Mrs. Adedokun will not be lonely in the house again. I entered and I saw the full family Mr. and Mrs. Adedokun, Segun, Dolapo and guess who I saw………

I greeted everyone in the house and all responded except Ifeoma. I ignored her and I was playing with both Segun and Dolapo. When I was about to leave I was called back

Mr. Adedokun: what is happening between you and Titilayo?

Me: nothing sir.

Mr. Adedokun: Titilayo called me this afternoon and she was crying. Then she explained what happened and what you told her

Mrs. Adedokun: (coolly) what happened between the two of you Accountant?

Me: the day I ought to be in Ilorin, the bus I took broke down on the road; and when we got to Gambari, we had to return to Ogbomosho because there was curfew in the town. And when I got to there I observed that someone was calling her with a UK number and she was ignoring it.

To Be Continued…