Story: True Life Story Of An Addict

8 years ago

Story: True Life Story Of An Addict

Deola: Ok. Where is my key please?

Me: Key? Why now? I told you that I’m going to hang on to this for the time being now, since your neighbour is not at home.

Deola: Ooooo. Ok. But you have to give me tonight cos I didn’t take the other one when I left home today. You can have it anytime you come to my place

Reluctantly, I released the key. I asked her afterwards if she’s hungry. I told her I had prepared eba for both of us with a nice vegetable soup.

Deola: Vegetable soup? How is that possible? Or, let me ask properly, who cooked the supposed “nice vegetable soup”? You told me you arrived past 6pm, right? When did you go to the market to get the ingredients?

Talk about close marking and mind-piercing question. My fast instinct failed me that moment. I couldn’t think of what to say without implicating myself. No, not now that I just received precious gifts from Deola. Not that she’s gonna collect them o but it definitely gonna leave a crack on the wall. That might spell the end of us in an instant. From nowhere, I just opened my mouth and said,

Me: Actually I didn’t cook it, my cousin did.

Deola: You have a cousin around here?

Me: Yes. She stays in Elf Bus stop. She’s a student of Mass Communication in UNILAG. She comes around at interval to say hello.

Deola: Really? But you never talked about her.

Me: Because you never asked. If you had, I would have.

Deola: That’s interesting. Can I meet her?

Me: Sure. I’ll hook you guys up later on.

Phewww! Fear grab me like mad. Thank God she bought it that moment cos I no get any for cousin anywhere ooo. That was the devil talking. She declined eating that evening on the premise that she had taken something at work before she closed. She stayed few more minutes before telling me she wanna start going,

Deola: I should be on my way Femi. It’s getting late.

Me: Haba Deola? It’s just past 9 now; and it’s not as if you’re going to work early. Stay with me a little now ehn, baby.

I went to her sit and sat at the edge of her chair. With my right arm wrapped around her shoulder, I plunged myself all over her, pressing on her all my weight.

Deola: You will suffocate me with this your weight brother.

Me: I won’t relieve you if you’re still bent on leaving now.

Deola: Ok. I am not going now again. I will stay.

Me: Better. That’s my girl. Baby, you know what, I think you are superb this morning. I almost fainted after that mind-blowing s*x.

Deola: Hmmm. I don’t know if something is mind-blowing or not. I just made sure I had fun, that’s all.

Me: Baby it was breathtaking. I have never met your kind all my life.

Deola: You can say that day again. There can be no other me anywhere in the world.

Me: I said we should talk earlier right?

Deola: Yea, but you also said I shouldn’t bother about it.

Me: Don’t mind me. I am a shy person really but now, I think I’ve got my groove and mojo back.

Deola: Really? Let it out then.

Me: I think I love you too Deola. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.

Deola: You think, or you know?

Me: I know…and I am confessing it my dear. I love you too.

Deola: That makes the two of us then. Good. Can I go now?

One thing that stood Ini out is the simplicity, conviction and sincerity in her voice whenever she talks. She would look me in the eye before she says anything that’s very important. However, Deola is not like that. I mean, I just told her I loved her and all she asked was if she could leave? WTF! No display of emotional feeling? I thought she’s gonna shout, scream, be happy, hug me, kiss me…you know? Just do something. She just sat down there with her head bowed as if she has been asked not to look up. She made me regret opening my mouth to tell her I love her. That’s not the kind of expression that befits a confession of love. I just wanna puke.

Me: Yes, you can leave.

She stood up, picked up her bag, adjusted her dress and walked straight at the door. I stood up and followed her to walk her to her. She turned around suddenlyand hugged me. She sank her tongue into my mouth and said,

Deola: I love you very much Femi with all my heart. Please, don’t break it like Wale?

Yeah! That’s what I am talking about. That looks more like it. Why pretend earlier then as if she doesn’t want it. Mtcheewww! Women sef. But wait ooo. Who is Wale?

Me: Hey baby, who is Wale?

Deola: Not tonight Femi, definitely not tonight.

Me: Alright. At your leisure and at your own time. I will wait.

Deola: Thanks. Good night my baby.

Me: Good night my love.

I walked her downstairs and watched as she drove off. I became so so desperate to know about Wale apparently for a clue on how to treat Deola, to know her turn ons and turn offs. My priority that moment was to know who and what Wale is, his relationship with Deola and what led to their breakup.

Cynthia has yet to call me. This girl dey find serious trouble. I don kuku dey think about prunning my tree and shedding off some weight. She is making herself a candidate for eviction!

20mins later, Deola texted to inform me that she has arrived home. The text read thus,

“Baby I am home. I hope you meant what you said. I’m too special to be toyed with or fooled. Also, don’t forget about your cousin ish. I wanna talk to her.”

Why is Deola always putting me on my toes? Every words she uttered were with verve and powerful tone. This kind babe go break your head o if you jilt her. Chai! I don enter one chance. Her incessant request of wanting to talk to my cousin raced my heart again? Hope say I never put myself for trouble so?

Should I do an arrangee* with Ini? Tell her to pretend she’s my cousin? No. I can’t toy with the love of my life. She’s too precious to be so downtrodden. Besides, she is not a yoruba girl, and she hardly speak the language. So, that ruled her out.

What about Cynthia? Ehn? That lioness? She go tear me to pieces. I will just be feeding her curiosity that I am cheating on her. She go just spoil the matter and cause katakata for my head. Besides, we still dey fight now. She offended me and she has yet to apologize. So, she’s out too. She’s only living on a borrowed time, she will soon be deported from my country.

I was still in the thought of what I am going to do about this cousin wahala when my instinct, my good friend when it comes to sharp shortcut, brought Janet’s image into my head.

Janet? Interesting! Should I arrange with her? But I hardly know this girl. I don’t even know if she speak yoruba. Well, let me try. I dialed her number and the following ensued,

Me: Hello.

Janet: Hellooooo. Good evening sir. Sorry I would have called you before now but I’ve been so busy. Thank you so much for today. God bless you real good.

Me: You’re welcome. God bless you too. How are you?

Janet: I am fine jare. I am ok.

Me: Has your boyfriend answered you call yet?

Janet: No oo, he hasn’t. Hmmm, in fact, he warned me through a text message never to call him or text him again. He said I should pretend I never knew him.

Me: Ha? That serious? What really happened between you guys?

Janet: I don’t even know for him.

Me: Na wah oo. Sorry ehn. Guys can be like that sometimes. Just give it time. He’ll come rushing back to you.

Janet: See uncle, I am tired of him. Let him go for all I care. If one person comot, another one go come.

Me: Don’t conclude that fast young lady. Never say never…

Janet: Uncle, I have made up mind on him. Enough is enough.

Me: Well, if that’s your stance, no problem. How is Ajah tonight?

Janet: Ajah is fine sir. What about your place? Where is that place sef?

Me: Oh, my place? I stay in Ikate. Ikate is good too.

Janet: Hmmm. That’s big boys area ooo. No wonder. No wahala now. Make we dey manage for this our village here. Make you no forget us for here sha o.

Me: Funny you. Who told you Ikate is big boys area?

Janet: I don’t need to be told. I know the place very well. I used to have a friend there.

Me: That’s interesting. Do you speak yoruba?

Janet: Baje-baje (i.e, very well). My dad is from Ogun State but my mum is a Ghanian. I was born in Ghana but raised here in Nigeria. My mum and I moved to Nigeria when I was 3yrs old.

Me: Wow! That’s interesting, charlie!

Janet: Hahahahaha. Unfortunately, I hardly speak my mum’s language. Just a little here, a little there.

Me: It’s understandable. Anyways, Janet, I need a big favour from you. Can we meet on Wednesday at Shoprite?

Janet: Shoprite? Se e fe se shopping fun mi ni? (Are you gonna do some shopping for me?).

Me: Not really. I want us to discuss something very important and I will be so so happy if you can do it for me.

Janet: As long as it doesn’t involve killing someone or stealing something, I will do it for you sir.

Me: I am happy to hear that. So we have a deal right?

Janet: Yes, we have a deal.

Me: Do you have transport to come?

Janet: I can’t say for now o. I will tell you tomorrow if I will have enough to bring me there.

Me: Don’t even bother. Pick a taxi from Ajah to shoprite. I’ll pay the driver when he brings you there.

Janet: Ha? Taxi? Isn’t that too much?

Me: It’s not too much Janet.

Janet: Ok oo. If that’s what you want, no problem.

Me: Thank you so much. I’ll call you tomorrow. Good night.

Janet: Good night sir. And thanks once again for today.

Me: Thank God.

Call ends.

Yes! I’ve got a cousin in Janet. I’d rather I used her instead of Ini or Cynthia. Janet’s yoruba accent was superb and clear. She spoke as if she had spent some times in Ibadan. Good choice. All I need do is ask her to pretend to be my cousin. All the details she would be needing will be provided her on Wednesday.

I gladly waka enter my kitchen and served myself a bowl of eba with the vegetable soup my queen had cooked. After the meal, I called Ini before I slept that night,

Me: Baby, how are you?

Ini: I am ok. Hope the soup is fair?

Me: It’s more than fair my lady. You’re the angel of my life. I’m so grateful Ini.

Ini: If I don’t take care of you, who will?

I giggled & ended the call.