Story: True Life Story Of An Addict

8 years ago

Story: True Life Story Of An Addict

Grace, for me, was “the Bleep of the century.” Big, robust, Britgerian accent, good sense of humor, elegant and more interestingly, psychic. She was way mature than Mary, both in age and size. How did we meet? Very funny. It was in a commercial bus.

There was an argument about what best fits Nigeria in terms of form of governance. Some argued for militarianism while many others stick with democracy. I wasn’t interest in the subject so I stayed mute, plugged earpiece into my ears and started listening to songs. But as the argument became hotter, I paused the song I was listening to and listened to the two sides. They argued back and forth with no compromise.

I decided to go back to listening to my song when I heard a voice so sweet and cool. According to her, she was a graduate of Political Science from the University of Ibadan, and her argument proves her right. She commanded absolute silence, even in a commercial vehicle. She argued as a scholar, one who truly understands the onus of the government to her citizens.

I was highly impressed by her brilliance. At the end of her argument, everyone in the vehicle applauded her, even the driver.

When the driver stopped for a passanger drop, I used the opportunity to sit close to Grace. Dang! She smell so good. I flattered her with words so soothing, I said I’ve never heard someone speak like that before in my life. She was happy I said those words, I guess the expression on her face said it all.

A quick glance at her phone revealed her taste. As at that time, SII Galaxy Phone was at least, a big phone. I took the opportunity to get her number indirectly. “Hey, I love this phone. Please can I see the specs?” She replied, “Sure, why not?” Upon receiving the phone, the first thin I checked was the kind of line she was using. It was an MTN sim. So, quickly and codedly, I dialled a “please call me” code and sent it to my MTN number. #SharpGuy

At the end of my pretence, I handed the phone back to her and continued normal chat. 10 mins later, she signaled her bus stop to the driver, much to the praise of everone in the vehicle. As for me, well, I got more than what the commuters couldn’t get, Grace’s phone number.

When I got home that day, I quickly saved the phone number and waited 2 more days before dialled her number. The following ensued between us:

Grace: Hello?

Me: Hello. How are you doing?

Grace: I’m doing good. Please, who is this?

Me: Well, this is funny. We met in a bus where you served us all with brilliant, educative and flawless argument about good form of governance.

Grace: Wow! What a good memory you’ve got but I didn’t remember giving anyone my phoe number.

Me: Well,….let’s say I work with NCC and I have access to many phone numbers.

Grace: (Laughs) That’s hard to believe sir. I don’t think that’s possible; not with someone I met in a public bus and didn’t give my phone number.

Me: Well, you’re right. Did you remember you gave me your phone that day?

Grace: Yeah I did. It was the phone you collected, not my number.

Me: I know right. That’s when I played smart on you. I sent a please call me with your number to my number instantly. So, I need not ask you for your contact before I can have it.

Grace: (She screamed) Jesus! Wooooowwww! You’re indeed smart. I’m impressed…

Me: (Before she finished her statement, I cut in) Can we met formally, please?

Grace: Ha? That’s hard o. So quick? I’m always the busy type sir. I work all day.

Me: Busy so much that you can’t spare a time for the chance to meet a guy who outsmarted you? This is a chance to meet a superstar my lady.

Grace: (She laughed so hard and finally said) Ok, ok. You win. Where do you want us to meet?

Me: (Feeling like a Obama, I was like) Errrmmmm, considering my status, one who commands unwavering fealty and reverence, I’ll speak to you about the place tomorrow.

Grace: Jooor oooo. Igwe! I hear you sir.

Me: Thanks my queen.

Grace: Queen. Abeg o. Thanks for the call. You made my day.

Me: You’re most welcome. Have a splendid day. Bye.

Ends call. Now, am I a genius or not?

As promised, I called Grace the following day. We exchanged pleasantries as if we’ve known each other for ages. Talk about Grace’s maturity; she’s just second to none. I was about telling her our meeting point when she said, “See let’s meet at your place. I’ll prefer your place to anywhere else, I don’t want to be too exposed.” I don’t know if I should leap for joy or scream. Anyways, I was so happy she chose to come, at least, I’ll have all the time in the world, confidence, freedom and what have you. Wednesday, 2pm was our agreed date and time. “Ok sir. See you Wednesday. I got to go now. I’ve a whole lot of chores to do. Bye” “Bye Grace.” The call ended.

This deal was struck on Monday. So, that leaves me with almost 38hrs of preparation. Quickly, I removed all my curtains, bedspread, dirty laundry and every other washables for washing. I cleaned all the cobwebs, dusted the chairs and electric appliances. You know now, I just cleaned everywhere. I rushed to Emeka’s shop for a nice air freshner (only God knows the last time I used one, lol).

When I got back from Emeka’s shop, I saw Grace’s missed calls on my phone…and a text message which reads: “Don’t bother to call back. I just wanna warn you that I don’t like seeing people around when I go a visiting. I hope you’ll understand. Bye.” Jisos! My heart raced faster again. Do I understand? Nne, I don’t only understand you, in fact, I upperstand* you sef. Immediately I called all my friends who loved coming to my house for PS3 Video Game that, “Guys, I won’t be around on Wednesday until very late into the night. I’ll call you when I’m back.” Tho’ they felt a little disappointed, they realised that was very unusual of me. So they agreed. Whatever appointment it is I have I placed on hold. Wednesday for me is a work-free PUBLIC and PRIVATE holiday… with Grace alone!

Fast forward. Wednesday morning, 10am.

I did the normal chores that day: cleaning and washing. I checked the fuel tank of my generator and noticed it was getting low. Quickly, I rushed to the filling station and bought for myself enough fuel that will serve me for 8hrs. There must be no power interruption. In fact, that day, I’m going on generator all through. If Nepa like make them bring light, e no concern me…

To Be Continued…