Broken and bruised - Season 1 - Episode 40

4 years ago

Broken and bruised - Season 1 - Episode 40

” Melanie don’t say after two months of doing this therapy that just because you still experience those horrible nightmares that this never helped because
you will relapse… understand that, recovering from a sexual trauma takes time and the healing process again can be so painful…… but with the right
strategies and support, you can move past the trauma, you can rebuild your sense of control and self worth…. you will even come out of it feeling stronger
and more resilient ”

“Do others who went through the same painful experience also feel what I’m feeling”

“Yes…maybe even worse, you see….regardless of age and gender, the impact of sexual violence goes far beyond any physical injuries……when raped, the
world doesn’t feel like a safe place anymore….. you no longer trust others, you don’t even trust yourself….. you may question your judgement, your
self worth and even your sanity, you may blame yourself for what happened or believe you’re dirty and damaged…. relationships may feel dangerous, intimacy
becomes impossible and on top of that like many rape survivors, you may struggle with anxiety and depression” Mel gets up and starts to pace up and down,
she’s sure she is just there
“I don’t think I’m understanding you miss…what I feel is deep, it planted in my system and yes you’re right, I’m struggling with myself and I want to
forget this yet I just can’t” the lady gets up too, she holds her hand

“Melanie you can’t say that…remember you trusted a stranger when the only man you loved abandoned you, a stranger rescued you and you agreed to go with
him to where you didn’t even know… that’s a big step that indicates you were already healing because of the support everyone gave you, you only had a
relapse when the wedding couldn’t take place but I’m hopeful you can get there with the right support” she leads her back to the chair

“How about this child I’m carrying….I’m not sure if I want to have it even”
“In most cases many victims would say they want to abort the pregnancy” Tobi’s eyes widen as the woman continued, that’s the last option he wants to think
about….his child can’t be aborted
“But I would not encourage that, you may feel that’s the best thing to do at this point because you think the baby will only remind you about what happened
but let me tell you, I have seen cases where the mother gets attached to the baby and their bond grows when the baby is still in the womb and by the time
they come into this world, she will see it as something that should live for and refuse to be separated from the baby….but right now what I can say is,
keep the baby and give birth, you can give him or her up for adoption later if you still don’t wish to have anything to do with it when that time comes”

Mel is quiet and processing all this just and the woman continues
“Sweetheart, what you’re going through right now…. what you’re currently experiencing is a normal reaction to trauma, your feeling of helplessness, shame,
defensiveness and self-blame are symptoms not reality…. no matter how difficult it may seem right now, you can and will come to terms with what happened
and learn to heal and move on with your life normally…..see, when your body goes through something stressful, your body temporarily goes into ‘fight-or-fight’
mode but when the threat passes, your body calms down……traumatic experiences like rape can cause your nervous system to become stuck in a state of
high alert….you become hyper sensitive to the smallest stimuli…. this is the Case for many rape survivors especially in the first few months following
the assault but if your nervous system remains stuck in the long run, you may develop posttraumatic disorder” she’s serious when she says this and deep
down Tobi prays it doesn’t get to this……