Valentine Blues - Season 1 - Episode 60

4 years ago

Valentine Blues - Season 1 - Episode 60

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*****
”What do you want Anna, i know you love him, why are you here?” he stares at her.
”Because, i want to make things right’
”How? I mean it’s all messed up, this was not the plan i had in mind for both of us, it wasn’t at all”

She nods ”I know, i messed up, ..Daniel stuff”

”Yeah Daniel, whom you love”
”I cannot deny that fact, i do love him and most people aren’t are strong as you are, look you are obviously over your ex i can see that but people love differently, and i am probably part of the weird ones who loves deeper and although he hurt me, i love him”
”Then why are you here, you should be telling him that Anna, not me” he says turning away, she touches his face and then turns him to her

”I am sorry Darren, really i am and if i could go back in time to change this all i would”
He shakes his head removing her hand ”No, i wouldn’t, because unlike that Natalia was saying, i have no regrets meeting you Anna, my only regret is that i should have met you when you were all healed from your pain, maybe we would have had a chance”
She sighs ”I wanted this, that’s why i said yes and …Daniel kissing me-”
”Twice!” He thins his lips.

”Twice, ” she says sadly ”Was not planned and be realizing that i still loved him was never in the books and-”’

”Its enough Anna, lets not dwell on that, his name makes my blood boil. I am exhausted and all Anna, really i need to rest”
”But we are still talking and i want to tell you all that i told Daniel in the room and-”
”I don’t want to hear it though, it doesn’t change anything”

”Darren, i am trying to make things right here”

”By telling me you love your ex, how does that work actually? It doesn’t.”
”But if you would just please hear me out and-”

”No Anna, i really do not-” he pauses for a brief second, holding his chest, then he shakes his head
”What’s wrong?”
”Nothing”

”Okay Darren, if you would not listen to what i have to- oh dear Lord” she breaths touching her chest too.
”You okay?” He has a worried look on his face as he watches her.
”Wow, must be the ship, did it turn or climbed the tide? Or i just suddenly felt seasick”

Darren looks towards the window, ”Maybe, you and me both” he says and then turns back to her.

”Look all i want to do is make things right, i am so sorry for hurting you, albeit unintentionally”
”Look it’s fine Anna, really, i think all the anger and all that is gone.”
”I know we can’t be the way we are anymore, but atleast we can i don’t know…”

He stares at her, waiting for her to continue.
*PRESENTLY*
”Can we start all over, please” she whispers

”Do you want to start all over to date me or start all over to be friends Anna?”
”I..friends..and we go on from there and see how it goes and…i…we were getting somewhere and …i..we can..erm..lets just start all over Darren” She stutters.

Darren smiles as he pulls her closer to him and then brings his head closer to hers ”Anna-” he breaths, she closes her eyes and breaths him in..
”Do you even know what you want Anna?”

”Yes!”
”What do you want right now?”
”I want..-”

”Think carefully Anna, because everything you say right now depends on this moment, think carefully and honestly..what do you want, what would make you so happy right now..what, who and why?”
Daniel, to love me as insanely as i love him, to have him marry me and me to be the mother of his kids as i have always dreamed.
To be happy..
That had been my thoughts for over three years . For now…my thoughts are all jumbled up.
”I have always been inlove with him as long as i can remember, and i won’t lie Darren..i wont. I want happiness, but i want happiness free of pain, stress and of confusion. I just want to be happy, that is what i have craved for so long.”

”So in order words; you do not know what you want , because if you really did want happiness, you would go for it..but what do you define as happiness, is it Daniel? A man whom you love, or is it me, a man whom you are just getting to know?”
”I ..Darren, we are wired differently..and..i know you loved Natalia strongly , do you not really feel anything seeing her again?” She searches his eyes

”Maybe we are wired differently Anna, and maybe i had reached my breaking point and i had to ask myself, do i let a girl hurt me as she did, do i linger in the pain of unhappiness, do i still let them in, or do i chase the light before my eyes and see where it leads?”
”And?”

He stares at her tucking a hair behind her ear and caressing her soft cheeks ”I choose the light before my eyes, but i guess it still prefers the darkness that shields it” he looks at her sadly ”And i do not blame you, nor am i angry with you Anna, i should have..i don’t know” he drops his hands ”Tread carefully before..” he trails off ,

Falling inlove with a broken bird who isn’t ready to let me mend her to health but choosing to go by the glass who broke her in the first place.

He says to himself.

”Before what?” She inquires
”I want this, i want us, i want you, but..i have to see beyond my feelings and put you first”
”What does that mean?” She asks
”It means that until you completely sort yourself out i would not go on. I know what you want and who you want, you would be lying to yourself, to me and then to people around you if you choose to ignore it. You know something else, it’s fine, everyone had loved one so deeply before, so if you need time to heal, you take it, but do not drag someone else into your chaos..it won’t be fair, not to me, not to you..not to anyone.”